


Christmas Goodbye Letter

by TheresaPotter



Category: Dawson's Creek
Genre: F/M, Miscarriage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-14
Updated: 2020-11-14
Packaged: 2021-03-10 01:33:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 36,342
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27556144
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheresaPotter/pseuds/TheresaPotter
Summary: Letters exchanged between Pacey and Joey years after their break up that gradually bring them back together
Relationships: Joey Potter/Pacey Witter
Kudos: 1





	1. Chapter 1

Description: this is a story I wrote while at work today. Its not really a story, its a letter to a guy that I'm in love with. I edited to fit Joey/Pacey. It's only a one shot for now unless I can think of somewhere to go with it. Suggestions are always loved if you like it and think it has potential to turn into more than just a one shot-er. This is my sixth Dawson's Creek story. I'll be writing this as well as Conflicted Love, Love Unrequited and Clueless Affection on here now.

Disclaimer: I may not own the characters but this story is original and from my imagination.

Author's note: this is my sixth try at a Dawson's creek story, be nice to me please. This could either be viewed in Pacey's or Joey's point of view. I'm writing it in Pacey's but it could also be viewed in Joey's if you use your imagination You decide and tell me who you see is as and why please. This is a Pacey/Joey fic, my version of how they got together. Enjoy and review thanks

Chapter #1

12/31/2002

Merry Christmas, Josephine Lynn Potter.

I am glad to see that you are back in Capeside safe and sound. It has been lonely without my best friend. We used to talk on the phone every night. Things haven't been the same since you left, Joe. If I were to be honest, I would say that things haven't been the same between the two of us for a while. That month and a half we went without talking last year was torture.

You and I have grown apart ever since, things just haven't been the same. The distance between us these days is staggering. It is probably for the best though. The good news is that I have finally stopped wondering if you will ever feel the same for me as I do you. If we were meant to be, I guess that you and I would be together right now.

Instead I'm writing this silly Christmas letter to you. This is what our once thriving relationship has come to Joey. You are probably thinking that this is yet another sappy love letter. You're probably expecting me to pour my heart out once again to you, Potter. To tell you that I love you, that I never really stopped. Not even after all of these years.

You are probably assuming that I'm writing you this Christmas letter in a last ditch hope to get you back. That's not what this letter is about though. I have come to grips with the sad truth. You and I aren't meant to be together Joe. If we were, we would be together right now. But we're not. You're living in the Big Apple and I still reside in Capeside. You're a successful writer and artist, while I'm a skilled cook and restaurant owner these days.

Truth is we have grown apart Potter. It was inevitable. There was a time when I was sure that you would be the girl I would marry. At times I still wish we would get married someday. But you have moved on, its time that I accept things and try to do the same. You will be happy to know that I have given up trying to win you over.

Will you always have my heart Joey? Of course. Absolutely, one hundred percent. Without a doubt you will. But it is time for me to move on. Its time that I find and settle for the woman that I will love second best. Whoever it is will never have my heart. My heart will be forever reserved to you Joey Potter. With hopes she will at least have my love. Who knows, with hopes there is a chance that I might have already found her Joe.

Merry Christmas Josephine Potter.

I hope 2003 will bring you as much happiness as 2002 did to me.

Love sincerely your best friend always,

Pacey J. Witter


	2. Surprised you wrote Witter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Joey write Pacey back after reading his letter

Description: this is a story I wrote while at work today. Its not really a story, its a letter to a guy that I'm in love with. I edited to fit Joey/Pacey. It's only a one shot for now unless I can think of somewhere to go with it. Suggestions are always loved if you like it and think it has potential to turn into more than just a one shot-er. This is my sixth Dawson's Creek story. I'll be writing this as well as Conflicted Love, Love Unrequited and Clueless Affection on here now.

Disclaimer: I may not own the characters but this story is original and from my imagination.

Author's note: this is my sixth try at a Dawson's creek story, be nice to me please. This could either be viewed in Pacey's or Joey's point of view. I'm writing it in Pacey's but it could also be viewed in Joey's if you use your imagination You decide and tell me who you see is as and why please. This is a Pacey/Joey fic, my version of how they got together. Enjoy and review thanks :)

Chapter #2

Hey Pacey J. Witter, Merry Christmas.

I have to admit, I wasn't exactly expecting to hear from you anytime soon Pace. We didn't exactly leave on the best of terms. Its nice to see that your doing well these days. Bessie told me that the Ice House has really taken off. Congratulations on owning the most successful restaurant in Capeside. I can't believe it has been ten years since the original Ice House burnt to the ground.

Leave it to my father to ruin one of the last memories that I had of my mother. That restaurant was her life. When it burnt to the ground, its not secret how crushed I was. But you rebuilt it Pacey. Words can't explain how thankful I am that you did too. Bessie and I owe you so much. You have put yourself out there for us on more than one occasion Pace.

Your kindness goes without saying. When Bess, Bodie and I were struggling with the Potter's B&B you didn't once hesitate to help us out. Without your help and persistence, we would have lost the house. Of that there is no doubt in my mind. Your really something else Pacey. I have to be honest, I don't know what I would have done without you back then. Aside from Dawson, you're the only one who has always been there when I needed you.

Countless times you have come to my rescue. You taught me to drive my rusty old run down truck, you helped Bessie and I recognize my mother's dream of opening a bed and breakfast. You risked your high school career when you found out that it was Matt Caulfield who ruined my mural, you bought me a wall. Pacey, you drove three hours in the middle of the night just to pick me up when I went from Cinderella back into a pumpkin.

That is when you shook my world Pacey Witter. When you kissed me, I didn't know what to do. I didn't know what to say. I couldn't think straight. The emotions that I felt from that single kiss are indescribable Pace. You sent me reeling. Truth is, I never fully recovered. Unfortunately, I was stubborn back then. When you kissed me, I lost it.

You didn't deserve the reaction I gave in response to our lip lock that day. You just took me by surprise. I never considered the fact that you might have liked me. You were Pacey Witter for god sake We were arch enemies ever since we were confined to a crib and diapers. I despised you and thought that you despised me.

Never would I have imagined my second oldest friend would fall for me, nor that I would eventually fall for him. Pacey, I just want to take this chance to apologize. You're right. Things haven't been the same between you and I for a while and it partially my fault. I have been pushing you away. Truth is I haven't grown up all the much since high school

I'm still that same girl who runs at the first sign of trouble. I regret how things ended between the two of us. Our break up was a bitter, anger filled, blame fest. You thought I was stuck in the present, unwilling to move forward. I thought you were obsessed with the future and trying to claim me once and for all as your own.

We both said a lot of things that we have come to regret that dreadful night last Christmas. Honestly I didn't expect to receive a card, let alone a letter from you this year Pacey. I want to be the first to say I'm sorry. I didn't want things to end the way they did. I miss you Pace. My life has been empty without you.

I'm not going to wisk back into your life and screw things up again Pacey. I promise to keep my distance. Losing you for the second time was hard enough. Maybe you're right, maybe you and I have grown apart. Maybe this all was inevitable. Things will never be the same between you and I will they? That is what I regret the most I think.

Well anyway, I should probably cut this letter short Pacey. Rehashing all of these old wounds is slowly taking its toll on me, if I don't say goodbye and end this letter soon there might be tears smearing my writing soon. It was nice to hear from you. I hope that you enjoy your Christmas Pace.

Merry Christmas Pacey J. Witter. Try not too party too much on New Years. Hope this upcoming year brings your increased happiness and good fortunes.

Love sincerely, your best friend always,

Josephine Potter.


	3. Simply put, I miss you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Description: this is a story I wrote while at work today. Its not really a story, its a letter to a guy that I'm in love with. I edited to fit Joey/Pacey. It's only a one shot for now unless I can think of somewhere to go with it. Suggestions are always loved if you like it and think it has potential to turn into more than just a one shot-er. This is my sixth Dawson's Creek story. I'll be writing this as well as Conflicted Love, Love Unrequited and Clueless Affection on here now.

Description: this is a story I wrote while at work today. Its not really a story, its a letter to a guy that I'm in love with. I edited to fit Joey/Pacey. It's only a one shot for now unless I can think of somewhere to go with it. Suggestions are always loved if you like it and think it has potential to turn into more than just a one shot-er. This is my sixth Dawson's Creek story. I'll be writing this as well as Conflicted Love, Love Unrequited and Clueless Affection on here now.

Disclaimer: I may not own the characters but this story is original and from my imagination.

Author's note: this is my sixth try at a Dawson's creek story, be nice to me please. This could either be viewed in Pacey's or Joey's point of view. I'm writing it in Pacey's but it could also be viewed in Joey's if you use your imagination You decide and tell me who you see is as and why please. This is a Pacey/Joey fic, my version of how they got together. Enjoy and review thanks

Chapter #3

Hey Josephine Lynn Potter, Happy New Years.

Truth be told, I wasn't expecting to hear back from you either. You're right, we didn't end on the best of terms. That is all in the past now though. I try to live in the present and not look back these days. I don't want what happened last Christmas to put some kind of permanent wedge between the two of us Joe. I miss you too believe it or not.

Thanks for the congratulations. Bessie told you correctly. The Ice House is doing really great. It is quite possibly one of the best restaurants in Capeside these days. You're right, it has been six years since the original Ice House burnt down. Funny how quickly six years has passed. Can you believe not ten years ago you and I hated one another Potter? We were arch enemies since we were in diapers, you got that right.

You and I have been through a lot together. I remember how crushed you were when your mother passed away Joe. You would just cry for hours and I hated it. So of course I would resort to the only way I could think of to drive you out of your funk, I would pick fights and bicker with you. It wasn't much but our bickering got your mind off your mother at least.

Things kind of spiraled down hill for Bessie and you when the Ice House burnt to the ground. That was a rough time, you both almost lost your house. I remember when I first suggested the two of you open up the Potter's B&B. You thought that I was crazy. But look at how great the B&B is doing these days? Guess it was a good idea of me to call that critic Fred Frickey when I did? His review put you guys on the map.

Joey, you never really needed me to come to your rescue. I just always wanted to I guess. Its in my nature to come and defend you. When I heard that it was Matt Caulfield who defaced your mural, I lost it. I honestly think that I would have kicked the crap out of him if Mr. Green didn't pull me off of him the way that he did.

The last thing I was thinking about at the time was my high school education being at stake Potter. When I saw how crushed you were, I was furious. All I wanted to do was hurt the person who had made you cry. Guess things will never change, I'm still like that to this day Joe. You know how protective I am of you.

Truth be told, I was shocked when you called me that night. I was convinced that jerk AJ had really swept you off your feet. When you asked me for a ride home, I knew something was wrong before you ever said a word. I was so confused that morning Joe. I couldn't figure out why you called me of all people to come and pick you up.

Then when you told me that I was the first person that you had thought of? That's when I lost all control. Kissing you like that wasn't my brightest idea. But I figured it was time to just sort of go for it. Your reaction was exactly what I expected it to be. You yelled. You screamed. You hit me, insanely hard I might add.

I understand why you reacted that way though Joe. ….Well, I do now at least. At the time I was hurt, confused and upset by your reaction. I thought for sure that I didn't stand a chance in hell with you. Boy did you ever prove me wrong that night you finally kissed me back at Dawson's aunts house over spring break.

Your putting it lightly when you admit to being stubborn Potter. You were just plain unreasonable at times. It was actually kind of annoying. It was always your way. You were never wrong. That's one of the things that I always loved about you though Joey. Stubbornness sure does run in your family. Your a fighter just like your mother was.

You never imagined that I would fall for you? Well welcome to the club Potter. Neither did I. Developing feelings for you wasn't exactly high on my priority list. When Dawson asked me to look after you that fall though, I kind of had no choice to become close with you. All the time we were spending together, it was only a matter of time that I fell for you.

Joey, you have no idea how hard I tried to get you to notice me. It proved to be an impossible feat though. If you weren't moping over losing Dawson or trying to save him from doing something stupid, you were caught up with that prick AJ. It seemed no matter what I did, it was never enough to catch your attention. I don't know how you didn't realize I liked you. I bought you a wall for god sake Potter.

I wanted to protest and argue with you when you wrote that you haven't exactly changed all that much. But then I realized, you're right Joe. You still are the same girl. You never stopped running at the first signs of trouble. I know that you regret how things ended between us. I do too Joey. Our break up was hard, and horrible.

I did think that you were stuck in the present, in my defense though you kind of were Potter. You weren't concerned with our future. You were happy and content just living in the now. I wasn't though. I wanted to know that we were going somewhere Joey. That we were going to last. But you couldn't give me any glimpse of hope, could you?

That's all that I ever wanted Joe. I needed some reassurance. That wasn't asking too much, was it? I can't lay all the blame on you though. You're right, I was fixated on the future Joey. I wanted a future with you. I wanted to marry you Potter. Guess we don't always get what we want though. I would be lying if I said that I was hesitant about writing you a Christmas card this year. You're right, last Christmas wasn't our best. But I couldn't just delete you from my life Joe.

Honestly, I just really miss you too Potter. Things haven't been the same since last Christmas. We haven't spoken or seen one another in god knows how long. It has been torture too. Not having you in my life is killing me. I don't expect you to wisk back into my life screw things up again. It wasn't you who messed things up to begin with. It was mostly me.

I'm the one who insisted on pushing you. I wanted to define our relationship once and for all. I wanted to know if there was a real future between the two of us Joey. When you couldn't give me a straight answer, it nearly killed me. Much as it pains me to admit it, I guess you're right. We have grown apart and it hurts.

I don't think things will ever be the same between us Potter. Whats happened has happened. We can't change the past Joe. The most that we can do is try and move forward and learn from our mistakes. I'm glad that you wrote me back. I didn't think that you would. It was great to hear from you Joey. I just wish that I could have seen you while you were visiting in Capeside.

Well anyway, I should probably cut this letter short. I don't want to ramble on too much longer. All this talking about the past is getting to me. Its bringing back memories that I was kind of hoping to keep buried and dead. I hope that your happy these days with your life Joey. I wish you nothing but the best, I hope that you know that.

Happy New Years Josephine Lynn Potter.

Love sincerely, Your best friend always,

Pacey J. Witter.


	4. Bittersweet memories

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Description: this is a story I wrote while at work today. Its not really a story, its a letter to a guy that I'm in love with. I edited to fit Joey/Pacey. It's only a one shot for now unless I can think of somewhere to go with it. Suggestions are always loved if you like it and think it has potential to turn into more than just a one shot-er. This is my sixth Dawson's Creek story. I'll be writing this as well as Conflicted Love, Love Unrequited and Clueless Affection on here now.

Description: this is a story I wrote while at work today. Its not really a story, its a letter to a guy that I'm in love with. I edited to fit Joey/Pacey. It's only a one shot for now unless I can think of somewhere to go with it. Suggestions are always loved if you like it and think it has potential to turn into more than just a one shot-er. This is my sixth Dawson's Creek story. I'll be writing this as well as Conflicted Love, Love Unrequited and Clueless Affection on here now.

Disclaimer: I may not own the characters but this story is original and from my imagination.

Author's note: this is my sixth try at a Dawson's creek story, be nice to me please. This could either be viewed in Pacey's or Joey's point of view. I'm writing it in Pacey's but it could also be viewed in Joey's if you use your imagination You decide and tell me who you see is as and why please. This is a Pacey/Joey fic, my version of how they got together. Enjoy and review thanks

Chapter #4

Happy New Years to you as well, Pacey J. Witter.

Sorry that I wasn't able to stay in Capeside long enough to see you this Christmas. I really had to get back to New York though. I promised Alexander that he could spend New Years with Greg and I in Time Square if it was alright with Bessie. He really loved it. Alexander was in such a hurry to get back that we left without saying goodbye to Dawson and his little sister Lily.

Speaking of Lily, I hear that Alexander and her have become quite the best of friends these days. Ugh, god. Who do they remind you of? Alexander climbs up the same ladder you and I once used to get into Dawson's room. Its kind of eerie if you think about it. Their the new generation of Capeside High, can you believe it? All that is missing is a Pacey junior.

There's already another Jen Lindley running around these days. I can't believe how much Amy looks like her mother! That little girl is so adorable. Its hard to believe that Jen has been gone for almost two years. Poor Amy, she'll never get to know how much of an amazing person her mother truly was. Its a shame. I still cry at night sometimes when I think of her.

I remember when we first meant Jen. I hated her the first day she stepped out of that yellow cab from New York and walked into our lives. She had stolen the affection of Dawson. I was so used to having all of his attention. Then Jen Lindley strolled into town and I was kicked to the curb. That was so long ago though. Jen and I eventually put our differences aside.

I miss her so much, I wish that she was still with us. If only Jen had known about her heart condition sooner, maybe she still would be. She could have sought help, she could have gotten on a donors list and received a new heart. Amy is in good hands though. Dougie and Jack sure love her to death. Now that I think about it, there is a Pacey junior in our mist.

Ever since Jack and Dougie finalized their adoption of Amy and adopted that little boy, its as though their a big happy family. You have to admit little Joseph does resemble you an awful lot Pace. He certainly is a chip off his uncles shoulder that is for sure. The little tike isn't even four years old and he's hitting on Lily!

I smell another Capeside love triangle in the mist. Joseph is chasing after Lily a girl whose half his age at eight. Little Alexander doesn't seem to hide his jealousy all that well either. He pushed Joseph down when they were all playing in the sand box on Christmas eve. Of course I was elected to have a stern talk with him. Leave it to Bessie to make poor aunt Jojo the bad guy.

It was either I talk with him or Bodie spanked him, I felt bad for the little guy. He reminded me of myself when Jen first came to town. Kind of ironic don't you think? Guess things don't really change all that much. Its nice to know that some things will always stay the same as the years slowly start to pass by us like a hurricane.

I still can't believe how great the Potter's B&B has been doing lately. Bessie and I sure owe our livelihood to you Pacey. You're right, if you hadn't of called that critic Fred Frickey, we would have lost the house for sure. You really were our savior. I don't know how Bess and I could ever repay you. Words can't describe how thankful I am to have you in my life Pacey Witter.

Boy do I sure know how protective you are of me Pacey. That is the understatement of the century right there! Even before you and I started dating and the whole Matt Caulfield incident, you were fiercely over protective of me. If anyone so much as looked at me wrong, you were on them like flames to a fire. That's what I loved about you most though Pace.

You were always there when I needed a shoulder or someone to make me laugh. I didn't know how good I had it until I lost you Pacey. You treated me like gold and what did I do in return? I wound up breaking your heart and shattering mine unintentionally in return. Some best friend I am right? But enough of the sorrow fest. It won't change things after all.

You were shocked when I called you that night? Why Pacey? You were one of my best friends. I knew that I could rely on you to come to my rescue. That is why you were the first person that I thought of that night. I knew you would rush down to come get me. I didn't want to spend another minute outside of Boston University.

You were right, I wasn't Cinderella Pacey. I turned back to a pumpkin the moment that I realized AJ was in love with his best friend. It hurt knowing that I was once again second best. First with Dawson, then with Jack...though its not his fault he realized he was gay. Then again with AJ? I was beginning to think that I was never going to catch a break.

Then you turned my world upside down with a single kiss. I'm glad that you understand why I responded the way that I did Pacey. I never expected you to kiss me. Hell, who am I kidding? I never expected that I would kiss you back! That was as much of a shocker to you as it was to me Pace. You didn't leave me much of a choice though.

You challenged me that night at Dawson's aunts house. You know how us Potter's are, we never back down from a challenge. We're just that hard headed I suppose. What did you mean when you said I was putting it lightly when I admitted to being stubborn Pacey? I resent that comment thank you very much. How could you call me unreasonable?

Do you really think that Pacey? You honestly think that I am unreasonable? That hurts a lot coming from you. Then again, you do know me best. Not to mention you were every bit as stubborn as I was. Guess that's one of the things that brought us together and eventually tore us apart as well. I was not that obsessed with Dawson back then!

Fine, so maybe I was torn up over our breakup. But what did you expect? Dawson was my first boyfriend you know. At the time, yeah I wanted him back. I didn't want Dawson to do anything stupid either. You were always coming up with new and illegal things for all of us to do. It was only a matter of time before you and Dawson spent a night in jail.

Gee Pacey, thanks so much for the vote of confidence. You didn't have to agree with me. I know that I'm right. I haven't changed much Pacey. You don't need to point out my flaws to me. I'm still the same scared little girl that I have always been. Even with Greg, I can feel myself starting to pull away from him more and more each day.

These days it seems all that he wants to talk about is our future together. He wants to talk about marriage. Can you believe it? Marriage! I'm not even twenty four yet and he wants to discuss marriage with me? The thought alone has me terrified. I'm not sure how much longer Greg is going to be apart of my life. We seem to be disagreeing on a lot of things these days.

That's how it all started with you and I, Pace. With Greg its as though I'm reliving our breakup all over again. I hate it! All we seem to argue about is our future. To be honest, I'm not sure that I see much of one for the two of us. If he keeps pushing marriage on me, I might have to end things with him. I don't want to, he's a great guy. Be he's not really giving me much of a choice these days.

I wasn't concerned with our future? That is a lie and you know it Pacey J. Witter. I thought about our future every single day! I didn't want to leave you behind, it was the last thing I wanted! I wanted you to come to Worthington with me, we could have gotten an apartment together while I went to school. Just because I didn't discuss our future with you, doesn't mean that I never thought about it Pace!

Things aren't going to be the same between us, you have that right Pace. You made your decision about our relationship. You let me go. You broke my heart, twice. There is no going back or moving forward from that. You didn't think that I was going to right you back Pacey? Well you were right. I wasn't going to at first.

Obviously I should have gone with my first instincts. I should have burned your letter when I was finished writing it. Writing you back was a mistake. Things were better left the way that they were between the two of us. We can't fix what has already been broken Pacey. Why should we even bother trying? There is no point to it anymore.

I should probably end this letter before I say something that I will only end up regretting. I'm sorry that I went off on you like that Pace. But its the truth and I take nothing I just said back. Its probably a good thing that you and I didn't have a chance to see one another while I was in Capeside for Christmas. Things wouldn't have ended on a good note.

I hope that you had a Happy New Years, Pacey J. Witter.

Sincerely yours,

Josephine Lynn Potter.


	5. Cinderalla in my eyes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Inside

one shot-er. This is my sixth Dawson's Creek story. I'll be writing this as well as Conflicted Love, Love Unrequited and Clueless Affection on here now.

Disclaimer: I may not own the characters but this story is original and from my imagination.

Author's note: this is my sixth try at a Dawson's creek story, be nice to me please. This could either be viewed in Pacey's or Joey's point of view. I'm writing it in Pacey's but it could also be viewed in Joey's if you use your imagination You decide and tell me who you see is as and why please. This is a Pacey/Joey fic, my version of how they got together. Enjoy and review thanks

Chapter #5

Hey Josephine Lynn Potter, how was your New Years?

Don't worry about not being able to see me on Christmas this year. You were busy and so was I. Its to be expected these days. Alexander went to New York with you for New Years? That's great Joey. I went to visit him and Bessie the other day. He couldn't stop talking about how amazing it was to watch the ball drop in Time Square.

You should have seen how big of a hug Alexander gave Lily when we all went to the Leery's for dinner last week. I thought that he wasn't going to let her go for a second. Its a shame that you weren't able to stay and make it to the dinner Joe. Everyone was there, even Jack, Dougie and their two little tikes. You're right Amy is looking more like Jen everyday.

That is one beautiful and lucky little girl. Amy may never get to meet her mother Jen, but she will certainly know her. The way everyone still talks of Jen, its almost as though she is still here. You're not the only one who misses her Potter. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about Jen. It almost doesn't seem fair you know?

Jen had such a promising future ahead of her. She finally had a good job, she gave birth to a beautiful baby girl and she had a loving home taking caring of Grams. I remember when she first found out about her heart condition. It was shortly after she gave birth to Amy. She was standing over Amy's crib watching her as she slept and catching up with me.

The next thing that I knew, she just collapsed. I was so scared Joey. Jen wasn't moving, I didn't know what to do. I yelled for Grams and we rushed her to the hospital. That's when they did blood work and cat scans and found out that Jen had a rare heart condition. The doctors said that she'd had it her entire life, but it hadn't become noticeable until she'd given birth to Amy.

Its a real shame that Jen hadn't found out about her condition sooner, you're right Joey. I can't help thinking, if she had, maybe she would still be with us today. We can't think like that though. Jen is in a better place these days. She's still with us too, we just can't see her. We'll be reunited with Jen again someday. That's the one thought that keeps me smiling when I think of Jen.

Joseph is certainly a chip off his uncles shoulder, you have that right Potter. You want to know what I caught that little tike doing the other day? He was pulling a Pacey and chasing Lily around the Leery's back yard like I used to do to you. When he finally caught her, he kissed her Joe! I was shocked and couldn't stop laughing.

Things really don't change do they? Those three really are a love triangle in the making. Alexander is not a big fan of Joseph. Those two don't seem to get along as much as Joseph and Lily do. Its funny how things work themselves out. Not ten years ago, I kissed you and almost ruined my friendship with Dawson. Now? Joseph is chasing Lily and heading right in my foot steps.

The Potter's B&B certainly is doing great. I won't lie. I stay there sometimes when I don't feel like going back to my empty apartment. I love helping Bessie and Bodie out whenever I get the chance to. You don't owe me anything Joe. I would help you and your family out any day of the week, you know that by now.

About the whole AJ thing and why you thought to call me first, I get it now Joe. It would have been awkward to call Dawson. I was the obvious answer and your right, I had no problem coming to your rescue. Secondly, AJ was an idiot to let you go Potter. If he couldn't see what he had right in front of him than he never deserved to be with you in the first place Joey.

You're wrong about one thing Joey, you never turned back into a pumpkin. You're still Cinderella in my eyes, you always will be. AJ and I seem to have a lot in common. I was an idiot too. I let you slip out of my arms twice. It doesn't look as though I'll be having a third chance with you anytime soon considering you're seeing someone currently.

Who is Greg anyway? You have never mentioned him before Potter. Why is that? How long have you been seeing him? What does he do for a living? Did he come with you to Capeside for Christmas this year? Why don't you want to marry him? You're twenty three Joey, that's not too young to start thinking about marriage.

Why do you never want to talk about your future? That is one of the things that drove us apart. Whenever I wanted to talk about life after Capeside you would just completely shut down and change the subject. I hated when you did that. You say that you thought about the future when you were with me? When?

Why the hell couldn't you discuss our future with me? You never once mentioned moving to Boston with me! Joey, you know that I would have followed you to Worthington and got an apartment with you. That's all I wanted to do! More than anything else. Maybe if you had told me that, we would have never broken up in the first place!

Don't you think that's something that I should know? Don't you think I would have eased up on the future questions if you had just told me you wanted me to come with you to Worthington? God, I can't believe you Potter! You're damn right that I'm calling you unreasonable Joe. You were and you still are. All I wanted was some kind of promise that we would be together after high school! You couldn't give me that though could you?

You're right Joey, I made my decision. I broke up with you because you were afraid of moving forward with things. You still are! I feel sorry for Greg. Eventually your going to wind up breaking his heart just like you did mine! You haven't changed one bit Josephine Lynn Potter and I'm starting to think that you never will.

It probably is a good thing that you and I didn't have the chance to see one another during Christmas. I would have hated to see things finally come to blows between the two of us. There are a lot of things that were left unspoken between you and I and now I can see why. There's no going back Joe. There is no changing things, you're right.

Whats done is done between the two of us. We can't change what happened, there's no time machine. We can't take back the pointed words we have both said to one another. I made a mistake when I wrote you Joey. I thought against it, but wrote you anyway. Honestly I was hoping that you and I would reconcile things.

Now I can see that is never going to happen. I wish that I never wrote you Potter, even more I wish you would have never responded. At least then I wouldn't have to relive the heart ache you put me through once again. This will probably be the last letter that I write you Josephine. I'm going to end this once and for all before I say something that I'll one day come to regret.

I'm glad to hear you had a nice New Years Josephine. Enjoy your life.

Sincerely yours,

Pacey J. Witter.


	6. Bitter words Exchanged

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Description: this is a story I wrote while at work today. Its not really a story, its a letter to a guy that I'm in love with. I edited to fit Joey/Pacey. It's only a one shot for now unless I can think of somewhere to go with it. Suggestions are always loved if you like it and think it has potential to turn into more than just a one shot-er. This is my sixth Dawson's Creek story. I'll be writing this as well as Conflicted Love, Love Unrequited and Clueless Affection on here now.

Description: this is a story I wrote while at work today. Its not really a story, its a letter to a guy that I'm in love with. I edited to fit Joey/Pacey. It's only a one shot for now unless I can think of somewhere to go with it. Suggestions are always loved if you like it and think it has potential to turn into more than just a one shot-er. This is my sixth Dawson's Creek story. I'll be writing this as well as Conflicted Love, Love Unrequited and Clueless Affection on here now.

Disclaimer: I may not own the characters but this story is original and from my imagination.

Author's note: this is my sixth try at a Dawson's creek story, be nice to me please. This could either be viewed in Pacey's or Joey's point of view. I'm writing it in Pacey's but it could also be viewed in Joey's if you use your imagination You decide and tell me who you see is as and why please. This is a Pacey/Joey fic, my version of how they got together. Enjoy and review thanks

Chapter #6

You do not get to have the last word in this Pacey J. Witter.

Who the hell do you think that you are? Why did I never want to talk about our future? Its simple, because that's all you ever wanted to talk about! We were seventeen for god sake Pacey, who has their future planned out at seventeen. You were asking me questions that I didn't know how to answer. I never gave you a glimmer of hope? That is a crock of shit Pacey!

That is a crock of shit and you know it. I was with you wasn't I? If I didn't see a future with you after high school don't you think that I would have broken up with you? Just because I didn't discuss the future with you, doesn't mean that I didn't see one with you Witter. You want the truth? Fine, here it is Pacey. I wanted to marry you someday.

You're probably wondering why I never told you this. Its because I was scared. I didn't want to tell you because I thought it would scare you off. Sure you were all about talking about the future Pacey. But marriage? What seventeen year old guy wants to talk about marriage? None obviously. We weren't even dating a year and a half and I already had our kids named.

I never told you about Greg because to be honest he's not really any of your business Pacey. Not that he even matters anymore. I broke up with him shortly after I got your last letter. I was so angry after I read what you had written to me that I wound up picking a fight with Greg. We broke up later the next day.

I haven't talked to him since. He stopped taking my phone calls. I haven't seen Greg in nearly two weeks. Its safe to say that him and I are over. He called me emotionally damaged. If I'm emotionally damaged its because my past boyfriends each played a crucial part in making me that way! Most of all you Pacey J. Witter!

Dawson was the worst of all, he was my best friend. I was fourteen when I realized that I liked him. Unfortunately he was too blind to see what was right in front of him. Then here comes Jen Lindley, little miss perfect perky boobs. Dawson and you couldn't stop drooling at the sight of her. For a year I resented Jen for the sole reason that she was with Dawson and I wasn't.

That's it, that was the only reason I couldn't stand the sight of Jen back then. Next thing I knew, Dawson and Jen were broken up and I had no excuses anymore. Jen and I were finally able to become friends. It wasn't long until Dawson started to see me differently, the way I had always wanted him to and we started dating.

Might as well have inserted that wedge right back between Jen and I. Once again Dawson came between our budding friendship. That's when Jack entered the scene. He was new to Capeside, he liked me and I sort of liked him. He posed a threat to Dawson for a while until I found out Jack was gay. You would think things would go back to normal between Dawson and I but they didn't.

It wasn't long until I felt him slipping away from me, we had fallen into a pattern and I could tell Dawson was getting tired of it. I thought that if I put myself out there and offered myself to him, things would change for the better. Then he rejected me. Talk about humiliating. Things were never the same between Dawson and I as a couple after that night.

Then the day I had been dreading all along finally came, Dawson broke up with me. He wanted to be alone and find himself. Why did he need to find himself? He was never lost to begin with. When he broke up with me I was crushed. I didn't know what to do so I just shut myself down emotionally. What else was I supposed to do?

Then college weekend came and I met AJ, at first I thought he was a complete jerk. But then once I got to know him, we clicked instantly. AJ and I had so much in common, he was into writing and loved reading my work. He enjoyed watching me draw and seeing my paintings. He was older, smarter, more experienced in life and was so passionate about everything that he did.

It wasn't long before I was looking forward to the weekends again. If I wasn't driving up to Boston University, AJ was coming to Capeside to see me. Things got serious between the two of us and quick. At the time I was the happiest I had ever been when I got to see AJ and hear about the latest piece he had written. Things were going great with us.

When AJ invited me to listen to him read a piece that he was receiving an award for, I was ecstatic. He wanted me to come for the weekend and listen to him recite some of his written work. Little did I know what I had in store for me when I arrived at his dorm. One of his oldest friends had come to visit and it wasn't long before I discovered that AJ was in love with her.

I did one of the hardest things that I had to do that night after I listened to AJ read a story he'd written about the girl he was in love with that wasn't me. I let AJ go. Who was I to stand in the way of his true love? That's when I called you Pacey. I called you to come get me and my life as I know it changed. You kissed me and my entire world collapsed before me.

I had no idea what to do. I was confused. I was scared. I was angry. So I did what I do best, I pushed you away. All I could think about was putting as much distance between the two of us as possible after you kissed me that day. My plan had worked great up until spring break when we went to Dawson's aunt's house. You had me backed against a wall Pacey.

There was no denying anymore that I had feelings for you. Before I knew what I was doing, I kissed you back. It wasn't long before Dawson found out about the two of us. I thought for sure after that, it was the end for you and I. But you kept fighting, right up until the day that you stopped and left me no choice but to chase after you.

Those three months sailing the open sea on True Love with you are something that I will never forget. Things were rocky at first when we finally returned to Capeside, but it wasn't long before it was all smooth sailing between us. That is until about a month before graduation. That's when you starting inquiring about our future.

You couldn't have just left well enough alone could you Pacey? You asked me if I wanted to be with you and I said yes. Why the hell wasn't that enough? Why couldn't you have let things be then? Why did you have to push me Pacey? Why did you insist on setting everything in stone between you and I? Were you really that threatened by Dawson?

Fine, so he offered to help me pay my college tuition, he did it as a friend. Dawson saw how much I wanted to go to Worthington! It wasn't some kind of a low blow at you Pacey. That's when you started up with all the questions about our future come to think of it. Did you honestly think that I would leave you for Dawson? If so, how stupid could you be Pacey!

I loved you! I wanted to be with you! I chose you! Not Dawson, I chose you Pacey J. Witter. That wasn't enough for you though was it? You wanted to gloat and shove it in Dawson's face. He lost and you won, was that it? God some things will never change Pacey I swear. When I couldn't give you the answers you had been looking for, you lashed out and ended things.

When you told me that it was over, it nearly killed me. I never expected you to break up with me. Other than our few minor differences, I thought things were fine between us Pacey. When we broke up, my entire world was flipped upside down. Are you happy now Pacey? You and I are at each others throats over a letter. A letter Pacey!

What the hell is wrong with us? We're fighting and taking cheap shots at one another through a stupid piece of paper. How stupid are we? God, no wonder Greg broke up with me. He was right, I'm still hung up on you. Why else would I be bothering to write you back right now after all of the hurtful words that you wrote in your last letter to me.

You broke up with me because you thought that I was afraid of moving forward, well maybe you were right. Maybe I will always seek out a reason to run. But you never gave me a reason not to Pacey! You never fought for me like you did when we first started dating. You didn't try to salvage things between the two of us.

You just let me go Pacey! That's what hurt most of all. You gave up on me. Instead of trying to talk things out and move forward from there, you gave up on me. I thinks that's what hurt the most Pacey, watching you walk away that night after you told me it was over between the two of us. It was as though you punctured a hole in my heart and then left me to bleed out.

I can't do this anymore Pacey J. Witter. I can't keep having the same fight with you over and over again. We're not seniors in high school about to graduate anymore. Our future is unraveling before us right now. I'm so tired of fighting, whats the use anymore really? Why are we still fighting over the same old shit for?

Four years ago you gave up on me Pacey. You broke up with me and walked out of my life without looking back. I haven't stopped hurting to this day. Well now it is finally my turn Pace. I'm walking out on you. I'm finally going to give up on you. After all this time, deep down I had always hoped you and I would someday settle our differences and work things out.

Obviously after your last letter that isn't going to happen anytime soon. So I'm done. I'm tired of thinking things will change between us. You obviously don't want to be with me or you would have been in New York by now trying to do whatever it would take to get me back. Four years I waited, four years I wasted.

Well I'm done. I'm not waiting for you to come to your senses anymore. I'm sorry its just not going to happen, I guess there never again will be an us when it comes to you and I. I'm sorry this is how it has to be Pace. I wish things were different. But it seems we just weren't meant to reconcile like I had once hoped.

I wish you well in life Pacey, I honestly do. Someday I hope you'll find someone who you'll love and who'll make you happy.

Sincerely yours,

Josephine Lynn Potter.


	7. Had no clue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Description: this is a story I wrote while at work today. Its not really a story, its a letter to a guy that I'm in love with. I edited to fit Joey/Pacey. It's only a one shot for now unless I can think of somewhere to go with it. Suggestions are always loved if you like it and think it has potential to turn into more than just a one shot-er. This is my sixth Dawson's Creek story. I'll be writing this as well as Conflicted Love, Love Unrequited and Clueless Affection on here now.

Description: this is a story I wrote while at work today. Its not really a story, its a letter to a guy that I'm in love with. I edited to fit Joey/Pacey. It's only a one shot for now unless I can think of somewhere to go with it. Suggestions are always loved if you like it and think it has potential to turn into more than just a one shot-er. This is my sixth Dawson's Creek story. I'll be writing this as well as Conflicted Love, Love Unrequited and Clueless Affection on here now.

Disclaimer: I may not own the characters but this story is original and from my imagination.

Author's note: this is my sixth try at a Dawson's creek story, be nice to me please. This could either be viewed in Pacey's or Joey's point of view. I'm writing it in Pacey's but it could also be viewed in Joey's if you use your imagination You decide and tell me who you see is as and why please. This is a Pacey/Joey fic, my version of how they got together. Enjoy and review thanks

Chapter #7

You're right Josephine Lynn Potter, you are absolutely right.

I want to argue, scream and fight with you right now but I can't. I have no right to anymore. Everything that you just said is one hundred percent right. Joey, I'm am so sorry. I didn't know...if I had...things would have been different. I can't believe it. You not only saw a future with me, you...you wanted to marry me Potter?

Jesus, Joey. I had no clue. You never said anything to me. Damn, I really screwed things up this time didn't I? If I had never broken up with you, we probably would have been married with a kid or two by now. The only reason that I wanted to talk about the future so much is because I was afraid that you didn't see much of one with me after high school.

Lets face it Potter, back then I was convinced that I wasn't going to amount to anything. I was barely passing our senior year and wasn't sure whether or not I was even going to graduate with the rest of you. Every other word out of your mouth was about Worthington and how you couldn't wait to get out of Capeside.

I was convinced that once graduation had come and passed, you would only see me as one more thing that was holding you back from what you wanted to do with your life. I didn't want to be that guy. Joe, I didn't want to be the guy who held you back from everything that you ever wanted to do with your life or be.

When you wouldn't discuss the future with me, I started to become worried. I thought that the only reason you refused to talk about things was because you didn't see a worthwhile future with me. That's when I panicked. I began to resent Dawson. I'm not going to lie Joey when he offered to pay for your tuition, I became slightly jealous.

I knew that it wouldn't be long before you realized that you deserved better than me. That you deserved a guy that was actually going somewhere in life. A guy more like Dawson and less like me. Once again I let my damn insecurities get the best of me. When I broke up with you, I thought that I was doing you a favor in the long run Joey.

When you started talking about community college and staying in Capeside, I knew it was only so you could stay near me. I couldn't let you sacrifice your future like that. Not for me. It wouldn't have been fair to you. I wasn't going to be selfish. That's why I broke up with you. I knew if I let you give up on Worthington and stay in Capeside with me, you would eventually grow to resent me Potter.

I couldn't stand the thought of you hating me. Not that things are all that different right now. You already hate me either way I'm not sure why I am even bothering to take the time to write this letter. You're not going to read it. Its just...I need to set things right with you finally Joey. I can't carry around this anger anymore. Its slowly killing me.

I'm sorry that you and Greg broke up because of me Joey. You were right, I had no right whatsoever to ask you about him. I wouldn't blame you if you never spoke to me again after all I said in my last letter. I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking straight. Something in me snapped and I couldn't stop writing. I don't even remember all the horrible things that I said to you.

In the end it all comes down to this, I was threatened by Dawson. You hit the nail on the head Joey. I'm not going to lie or try to deny this fact anymore. Truth is, I was threatened by Dawson the entire time you and I were dating. I just tried not to let it get to me. Then when you found out that you might not have been able to go to Worthington, I saw how crushed you were.

You had found out that your Scholarship to Worthington was being withheld and you might not have gotten it at all. I saw how devastated you were. It was killing me that I could do absolutely nothing to help you out. Then in swoops Dawson with his offer to help pay your tuition. When he told you his proposal, I remember how your eyes lit up.

I had never seen you so happy before in my life. Dawson was the one who had made you that happy though, not me. Dawson was able to put up the money so you could go to the college of your dreams and I wasn't. That was the straw that broke the camels back for me. I knew it was only a matter of time before you saw I wasn't worthy of you anymore.

I couldn't give you what you wanted or needed Potter. It was only a matter of time before you realized this and left me for someone better. Someone like Dawson, someone who could give you what you needed and had a future that didn't involve growing old in Capeside. I wasn't that guy Joe. I'm still not that guy. I couldn't wait around for you to leave me.

That's when I started questioning about our future, you're right. I wanted to know where I stood in your life. I wanted to know that you still wanted to be with me. To be honest Joey, I wasn't all that sure if you did or not even when you said so yourself. I couldn't figure out what it was that you saw in me that made you want to stay. That's what scared me the most.

I was a nobody back then Potter, I was a loser. At the time, I was convinced it was only a matter of time until you figured that out and traded up. It got to the point where I would just wait for you to dump me. I was certain that it was only a matter of time. I would lay up at night driving myself crazy with all sorts of scenarios of how you would leave me and tell me once and for all that it was over.

To be completely honest Joey, no I'm not happy now. I don't know why we are at one anothers throats. What started out as a friendly Christmas letter has turned into a shouting fest. I'm so tired of all our fighting Potter. You're right its not getting us anywhere. Four years and the two of us haven't changed one bit. I haven't been able to hold a steady girlfriend.

Every girl I'm with means absolutely nothing to me. Sooner or later we always wind up breaking up over the same thing. Every girl since you tells me that I'm emotionally unavailable. Now you're telling me that Greg called you emotionally damaged? That's funny, I haven't seen you at the meetings. Joey, you and I are so damaged its a wonder the two of us aren't together anymore.

I did stop fighting for you, and I am so sorry for that Joey. When you refused to talk about the future with me, I shouldn't have broke up with you. I should have put up some kind of a fight. I should have yelled, I should have screamed at you. I should have made you open up to me instead of ending things between us and pushing you away from me once and for all.

Joey, I was such an idiot back then. If you never forgive or speak to me again, I will completely understand and respect your wishes. I don't want to fight with you anymore Potter. I don't want to continue this endless cycle of bitterness toward you. This was never what I intended when I first wrote you before Christmas.

Four years ago I did break up with you. I walked out of your life and never wanted to look back. I have regretted it everyday since Joey. I don't want you to give up on me. Please don't. Don't walk out on me Potter, not now. Not after all that we have been through. I couldn't live with myself knowing that I'm the one who completely ruined things between the two of us.

If I had known that you waited four years for me to set things right between you and I...I never would have made you wait that long Joe. You don't know how many times, I thought about driving to Worthington and begging for your forgiveness, pleading for you to take me back. Even more recently, there has been so many times that I was ready to drive to New York. But I stopped myself every time.

What right did I have to ask for your forgiveness. Why would I think that you would ever forgive me in the first place? I walked out on you. I broke your heart. I made you cry. The worst part was, I still loved you when I did it. I was in love with you when I broke your heart all those years ago. I still am. I don't know if I'll ever stop loving you Potter.

Your wrong about one thing Potter, I do want to be with you. I never stopped wanting to be with you. The only reason I'm not in New York right now is because you told me you were seeing a guy named Greg in your last letter. Your not with him anymore though. Nothing is stopping me from coming to New York anymore.

That's it, I'm coming to New York Joe. I'm going to do what I should have done...what I wanted to do last Christmas. I'm going to ask you to marry me once and for all. You can protest, and tell me to go to hell all you want. By the time you get this letter I'll already be in New York. I'm not leaving until I get a yes or no answer from you either Joey. Like it or not, you have a decision to make.

I love you Josephine Lynn Potter, and I'm not returning to Capeside until I've made you my wife. Guess I'll see you soon.

Sincerely yours,

Pacey J. Witter


	8. Shouldn't have come

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Description: this is a story I wrote while at work today. Its not really a story, its a letter to a guy that I'm in love with. I edited to fit Joey/Pacey. It's only a one shot for now unless I can think of somewhere to go with it. Suggestions are always loved if you like it and think it has potential to turn into more than just a one shot-er. This is my sixth Dawson's Creek story. I'll be writing this as well as Conflicted Love, Love Unrequited and Clueless Affection on here now

Description: this is a story I wrote while at work today. Its not really a story, its a letter to a guy that I'm in love with. I edited to fit Joey/Pacey. It's only a one shot for now unless I can think of somewhere to go with it. Suggestions are always loved if you like it and think it has potential to turn into more than just a one shot-er. This is my sixth Dawson's Creek story. I'll be writing this as well as Conflicted Love, Love Unrequited and Clueless Affection on here now.

Disclaimer: I may not own the characters but this story is original and from my imagination.

Author's note: this is my sixth try at a Dawson's creek story, be nice to me please. This could either be viewed in Pacey's or Joey's point of view. I'm writing it in Pacey's but it could also be viewed in Joey's if you use your imagination You decide and tell me who you see is as and why please. This is a Pacey/Joey fic, my version of how they got together. Enjoy and review thanks

Chapter #8

You shouldn't have come to New York, Pacey J. Witter, the timing was all wrong.

I am so so sooo sorry Pacey. I...I didn't know you were coming. If I had, I would have stopped you. Not even two days after I mailed that letter out to you, I realized that I was nearly a month and a half late with my period. I went to the drug store to buy a pregnancy test. It came back positive Pacey. How could this have happened?

How did I end up pregnant? I was so careful, we used protection every time I'm even on birth control. This just isn't possible. How could I be pregnant? My cycles are usually regular like clock work Pacey. I have been so preoccupied with catching up/arguing with you and fighting with Greg, I never noticed that I was late with my period.

I found out two nights before you came to New York to see me. The next day I had spent all day trying to get a hold of Greg. He was still refusing to take my calls. Finally, I was able to catch him outside of where he works. I explained to him that we needed to talk and he reluctantly agreed. When I told him that I was pregnant, Greg didn't know what to say.

The first words out of his mouth when I told him were, 'are you going to keep it?'. What the hell kind of a question is that? Am I going to keep it? Why the hell wouldn't I keep my baby? I couldn't believe that he would ask that. All his talk about wanting to get married someday and Greg asks me that? As if abortion would have ever been an option?

I knew telling him would be a mistake. As if it would magically fix things between the two of us? That's when I lost it, I went off on him. I told Greg that if he didn't want to be the father of my baby that was fine by me. I didn't need his support. Then I took off, I left Greg in the restaurant we were having dinner in and went back to my apartment.

I was scared Pacey. I was tired, stressed and on the verge of having a nervous break down. I didn't know what to do. All I knew was that I had no intentions of having an abortion like Greg had originally suggested. Unfortunately that choice wasn't left up to me Pacey. It wasn't long after I had gone to sleep that night that I had began experiencing severe abdominal pains.

At first, I tried to ignore them and go back to sleep. It didn't take long for them to become more frequent and painful. When I got up to go to the bathroom, I had realized that I was bleeding. I panicked and drove myself straight to the emergency room. I had no idea what was going on. Once I got to the hospital, I had to wait two hours for a doctor to see me.

When the doctor finally came to examine me, he asked what was wrong and I told him. I explained how I had just recently found out I was expecting, that I was a month and a half late. That's when the doctor grew quiet and lowered his head. I asked him what was wrong and that's when he told me, I...I had a miscarriage Pacey.

Yeah, you left before I had the chance to stop you after you found out I was pregnant Pacey. Not that I blame you, after coming all the way to New York like you did and hear that? I probably would have left too. Once the doctor told me this I was inconsolable. I couldn't stop crying. The doctor tried telling me that it was normal, but that wasn't very comforting.

He explained that nearly twenty percent of all pregnancies result in a miscarriage. He asked if I had been stressed out from work or anything else lately, apparently stress can trigger a miscarriage and that's what happened in my case. After he finished examining me and I was free to leave. I got the hell out of the hospital.

I sat outside in the parking lot for three hours just crying my eyes out. I couldn't believe that not even two days after finding out I was pregnant I had miscarried. By the time I finally got home, I was stressed and exhausted. All I wanted to do was go to sleep and not wake up. When I got back to my apartment though, Greg was there.

He had been waiting for me the entire time I was at the hospital. He apologized and begged me to forgive him. When I finally relented and accepted his apology, he got down on one knee. Before I knew what was happening, he proposed. Greg told me that he was wrong for ever suggesting that I have an abortion. H-he wanted to be apart of my babies life. He wanted to marry me.

After he proposed, I broke down all over again. He couldn't figure out what was the matter with me. If I was crying happy or sad tears. Once I finally calmed down, I explained to him where I had been and what had happened. When I told Greg that I'd just had a miscarriage, he didn't know what to say or do. He was in a state of shock.

When he finally snapped out of his surprise, he pulled me into his arms and just held me. I didn't want to be alone so I asked if he would stay the night and he agreed without hesitation. The next morning we went out for breakfast and when we came back, you were there waiting. When I saw you waiting on my doorstep, I froze. You were the last person that I was expecting to see Pacey.

Pacey, I don't know what to say. You showing up in New York wasn't even a thought in my head until I saw you with my own two eyes. Greg and I were in the midst of talking things out. He wanted to work out our problems. He wanted to be with me. I told him that I wasn't going to accept his ring. Not right away anyway. He proposed for all the wrong reasons.

Greg asked me to marry him because he thought it was the right thing to do. I don't want to marry a guy because they feel obligated. When Greg figured out who you were he flipped out. He didn't understand why you were here. He thought that I asked you to come see me. When Greg got in your face, I thought for sure the two of you were going to start fighting.

That's why I stepped in between the two of you. You didn't give me much of a choice Pacey. I saw your fists clenched at your side. I knew that if you and Greg fought, he would end up in the hospital. He wouldn't have stood a chance against you Pacey and I knew that. When you asked me if we could talk, I was torn. I didn't know what to do.

Greg had made it clear that if I left to speak with you, he wasn't going to be there when I got back. I couldn't just send you away though. Not after you had driven all the way up from Capeside to see me. I wanted to smooth things over with you Pacey. I didn't want there to be this bitterness between us. I wanted us to be Joey and Pacey again, even...even if we weren't together.

Pacey you have to believe me when I tell you that I had no idea that you were coming to New York to propose to me. I didn't have the chance to read your letter until it was too late. I found and opened it later that same night after you took off on me. It was buried under a stack of junk mail. I am so sorry Pacey, I had no idea. If I had known you were on your way to see me, I would have stopped you before you ever left Capeside.

It just wasn't the right time. Once I told you I was pregnant and Greg had proposed to me, you went off on me. I never had a chance to tell you anything else that had happened, I couldn't get a word in edge wise with you Witter. Once you were done, yelling and screaming at me and cursing the fact you ever came to see me let alone bought a wedding ring...you were gone before I ever had a chance to react.

When you screamed that you couldn't believe you ever wanted to marry me, I froze. I never expected you to propose to me. In my last letter I had made it pretty damn clear that I was done waiting for you and was moving on with my life. By the time everything you said sank in and I had a chance to react, you were already in your car and gone.

What was I supposed to do? I couldn't exactly go after you. When I finally managed to walk back to my apartment, I found that Greg was gone. He lived up to his promise, he wasn't there waiting when I returned. In a matter of not even four days, I had found out that I was pregnant, had a miscarriage and had gotten proposed to twice. ….Well, almost twice.

You never actually proposed to me Pacey. Once you found out Greg proposed to me and I was pregnant you took off before I could say another word. I don't blame you though, I would have done the same if I were you. Why would you want to hear me out after I just dashed your hopes of asking me to marry you? This has been one hell of a week.

Now I'm completely alone. Its my own damn fault though. I pushed everyone who cared about me away. You, Greg, Dawson when he came to visit me last summer. I deserve to be alone. I don't expect you to sympathize with me now that you know the truth, that I miscarried. The last thing I want is your pity, let alone anyone elses.

After I told Bessie what happened and all that I had been through, she insisted that I take a few weeks off work and come stay at home in Capeside. When I told her that I couldn't afford to, she told me she wasn't giving me a choice. I could either take my work with me or she was coming to stay with me. Bessie didn't give me much of a choice.

I'm coming back to Capeside, I don't know how long I'll be there. My publicist, told me to take as much time as I need. She said that if I wanted I could even stay in Capeside and send her my work. She explained there wasn't any real need for me to stay in New York, I could commute back and forth once or twice a month to show her the transcripts of my latest projects.

Basically if I wanted, I could move back to Capeside. Nothing is stopping me. I have nothing holding me back and no obligations to stay in New York. I make enough money to put a down payment and pay mortgage for a house. I'm not sure if that's what I want though. Bessie made it clear that she wants me back in Capeside to relax and be with family for a few weeks.

I'm supposed to be driving back Friday night. Whether you want to see me or not while I'm in town is completely up to you Pacey. Once again, I know that we left on bad terms. If you choose to come see me while I'm in town, that's not up to me. You know where I will be. After reading your last letter it is overwhelmingly obvious that you and I have a lot to discuss.

Once again I am so sorry for how things went down in New York. If I had known you were coming, I would have stopped you Pacey. I hope its not too late. I hope there is still a chance you and I can reconcile our friendship if not work things out and get back together once and for all. I'll be back in Capeside for a while, whether I return for good or come back to New York is still up in there air.

Hope to see you soon Pacey, I hope what went down in New York wasn't 'all she wrote' for the two of us.

Sincerely yours,

Josephine Lynn Potter.


	9. I wouldn't blame You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Description: this is a story I wrote while at work today. Its not really a story, its a letter to a guy that I'm in love with. I edited to fit Joey/Pacey. It's only a one shot for now unless I can think of somewhere to go with it. Suggestions are always loved if you like it and think it has potential to turn into more than just a one shot-er. This is my sixth Dawson's Creek story. I'll be writing this as well as Conflicted Love, Love Unrequited and Clueless Affection on here now.

Description: this is a story I wrote while at work today. Its not really a story, its a letter to a guy that I'm in love with. I edited to fit Joey/Pacey. It's only a one shot for now unless I can think of somewhere to go with it. Suggestions are always loved if you like it and think it has potential to turn into more than just a one shot-er. This is my sixth Dawson's Creek story. I'll be writing this as well as Conflicted Love, Love Unrequited and Clueless Affection on here now.

Disclaimer: I may not own the characters but this story is original and from my imagination.

Author's note: this is my sixth try at a Dawson's creek story, be nice to me please. This could either be viewed in Pacey's or Joey's point of view. I'm writing it in Pacey's but it could also be viewed in Joey's if you use your imagination You decide and tell me who you see is as and why please. This is a Pacey/Joey fic, my version of how they got together. Enjoy and review thanks

Chapter #9

You're absolutely right Josephine Lynn Potter, I should have never come to New York.

My timing was all wrong. I was dead set on proposing to you. I was sure that you would have said yes, even if it weren't right away. I can't even begin to explain how angry and jealous I was when I arrived and saw you with Greg. I resented that guy from the moment I saw him. He had you in his arms, he was kissing you, he had you smiling.

It was killing me to see how happy you looked with this guy Greg. I couldn't remember the last time I had seen you so relaxed and happy. When you told me that it was over between Greg and you, I'm not going to lie to you Potter, I was relieved. That meant that I finally had my chance to make things right with you once again.

That's the whole reason that I came to New York to begin with. I knew that if I wanted you back in my life permanently, I was going to have to make the first move. I was fine with this too. In your last letter you told me that you had grown tired of waiting for me. Joey, I had no clue that you had ever been waiting to begin with.

If I had, do you honestly think that I would have made you wait that long? Truth is, when we broke up four years ago...I thought that I had blown my chance with you Joey. I don't know why I ever let you go. I guess its because I was insecure and afraid. Even if you didn't realize it, I knew that you could do better than the likes of me.

I refused to let you settle. You were talking about staying in Capeside and attending community college. I knew for a fact that wasn't what you wanted Potter. I couldn't let you stay in Capeside for me. Even if that's what I had wanted all along. I had to let you go Joey. I didn't have much of a choice. If you stayed in Capeside, you would have been miserable.

I didn't want to give you yet another reason to hate or resent me Joe. That's why I broke up with you after the senior prom. Its wasn't because I didn't love you anymore. I never stopped loving you, you should know that by now Joey. I couldn't allow you to give up your dreams and Worthington, I knew if you did in time you would grow to hate and resent me.

That was the last thing that I wanted. So I did the only thing that I could think to do, the only logical thing. I broke up with you Potter. I ripped your heart out and stomped on it as hard as I could. I purposely pushed you away from me. That was the only way that I knew I wouldn't screw up your future. You were meant to accomplish great things Joe, and you wouldn't have been able to do that if you stayed in Capeside and let me weigh you down.

I know this wasn't a reason to completely shatter your heart, but you have to at least try to look at things from my perspective. I was a loser, a nobody, I wasn't going anywhere in life Joey. I wasn't going to amount to anything. I didn't want to drag you down with me. In my eyes, letting you go was what I thought would be best for you.

It killed me to break your heart Joe. The look in your eyes when I told you that it was over between us...its been permanently burned into my brain ever since. You looked so hurt, so confused, so sad. All that I wanted to do was hold you but I couldn't. I was the one who hurt you. The tears that you were crying were because of me.

I regretted my decision as soon as I had made it. There was no turning back though, what was done was done. There was no going back. I couldn't take back what I had done. In the long run I knew that it was for the best. I just wish that my heart would have been able to see eye to eye with my damn logic.

When I saw you last Christmas, all the old emotions came flooding back. It was as though the dam had broke the moment I saw you. Early in the year when we had started talking again and were on good terms once again, I had become brave. I saved up two months worth of paychecks and bought the nicest ring that I could find.

It was my full intention to propose to you last Christmas, Josephine Lynn Potter. Unfortunately, things didn't go as planned. You and I wound up getting into a huge bickering match on Christmas eve. I can't even remember what it was that we started fighting about. But I knew after our bitter words, there was no way that you would have said yes if I proposed.

So I put the ring away. I placed it in my safe. I knew that there was no way in hell that I was going to return it anytime soon. I figured that I would just save the ring for when the time was right. One way or another, I knew we were destined to spend the rest of our lives together though Joe. If that meant that I had to wait once more until the time was right? I was ok with that.

Even though you and I started fighting through letters this past Christmas, once you told me that you had ended things with the guy Greg that you were seeing, I knew this was the right time to propose. I didn't want to wait any longer, I couldn't stand being so far away from you for so long. It was taking its toll on me Potter. I missed everything about you. I missed your smile, the way you rolled your eyes, your laugh, the way it felt when you were in my arms, the taste of your lips on mine when we kissed...I missed it all Potter.

Not having you in my life for so long was killing me. I needed you. I hoped that you missed and needed me as well. After I had read your last letter, I felt like a complete jerk. I had no idea that you had been waiting for me. If I had, I never would have hesitated to beg for your forgiveness. When you mentioned how Greg was out of the picture, I pounced on my chance to come see you and propose.

I was ecstatic to say the least, I had it all planned out in my head. The entire time that I drove down to New York, I kept imagining what your reaction would be and you saying yes. Making you happy was all that I could think of Joe. When I first got to your place, you weren't there. I remembered that you had a hide-a-key. I figured you wouldn't mind if I let myself in.

I had come prepared. Before I got to your place I had bought groceries and was all prepared to cook dinner after I proposed to you. Unfortunately I never got the chance. I fell asleep waiting for you to come home. When I finally heard your front door open, I woke to notice you weren't alone. He was with you. I didn't know what to think, I was angry and frustrated.

In your last letter to me, you made it clear things were over between the two of you. I couldn't figure out why he was there with you at your place. Then when Greg blurted out that you were engaged and pregnant, I lost it. I didn't know what to say or do. He had just dropped a huge bombshell on me. I never expected you to be either of those, especially pregnant.

It wasn't long before I had become furious. This guy had knocked you up? You were just going to marry him because he got you pregnant? That didn't sound right, that didn't sound fair either. Here I had driven all this way and for what? To find out that you were engaged and pregnant? I couldn't believe my luck. I was angry and in shock.

I needed to talk with you. I needed to hear it from you. I didn't want to believe that prick Greg. That's why I asked if we could talk alone. I needed to hear it from your lips. Once I finally got you alone, you confirmed my worst fears. You were indeed pregnant and engaged to that jerk. After you told me this, I lost it. I didn't want to scream or yell at you. So I did the only other thing that I could think of. I left.

I couldn't face either of you any longer Joe. If I had stayed, I knew without a doubt that I would have clocked Greg. I would have laid him out and enjoyed every minute. I knew it wouldn't solve anything though so instead I left. I hopped in my car, took off and never looked back. I didn't know what else to do. I just knew that I needed to leave and fast.

I couldn't believe you were pregnant, I was furious the entire drive back to Capeside. I had always envisioned your first child being mine and when we were happily married. Never in a million years did I think that you, Josephine Lynn Potter, would ever wind up getting pregnant. As you said, you were always so safe. It felt unreal, the thought of you getting knocked up.

I had half the mind to turn my car around and kick the crap of out Greg for what he had done to you. He ruined any chances out you and I getting back together and I hated him for that Joe. Reading over the last letter you sent me, I still do. I despise Greg for what he did. Sure, you were on birth control. But I'll bet there were times he convinced you not to use further protection.

This pregnancy was his fault. When I read that you miscarried, I didn't know what to think. I felt so horrible for you. Even worse, I felt guilty at the sigh of relief that I breathed. Its wrong, I know Potter. But the thought of your first child being from any other guy that wasn't me had me seeing red. I always pictured my first child with you. No one else, only you.

I can't imagine what your going through right now Joey. You must be so torn up inside and feel so...alone. I wish that I could have been there for you. I feel like crap Joe. If you weren't so stressed from arguing with me through a letter and fighting with Greg, things would be different. You wouldn't have lost the baby. I can't help blaming myself. Your in pain and I don't know what to do.

It was really great of Bessie to make you come back to Capeside for a few weeks. You should Potter. It will do you some good to be around family and take your mind off of things. I'm not sure if you and I seeing one another while your back is the best idea though. Once again the last time I saw you didn't end on the most pleasant of terms.

I would hate for you and I to get into yet another fight. Don't you think that we have had enough of those? I think it would be best if I just gave you your distance. I don't want to say anything that I'll come to regret and I'm sure neither do you. To be honest, it would be too hard to face you. Especially knowing that you were all but engaged the last time I saw you.

If you hadn't of miscarried like you did, you would be engaged Joe. This thought alone is enough to kill me. The thought of you marrying another guy and having his child, it infuriated me. I almost lost my chance with you. God, listen to me. I sound like such a jackass right now. You lost your baby and here I am almost relieved with this knowledge?

I wouldn't blame you if you never spoke to me again Potter, honestly I wouldn't. I think its really great that your considering moving back to Capeside. I hope that someday you and I could once again work out or differences. Even if we never wind up getting back together. I still want you back in my life Joe. I love you. I'm just not ready to see you see to face right now.

After all that has happened, I hope you will understand why I won't be coming to visit you while your in Capeside these next few weeks. Please don't hate me forever or think I'm being a jerk. Its just...I'm not ready to face you yet Joey. Not after all that has happened just recently.

I love you Joe, if I saw you while you were in town and we fought? I would shatter me.

Again, I hope you can find it in your heart to understand and not be angry that I won't be visiting you.

Love sincerely yours always,

Pacey J. Witter.


	10. Shame on you Pacey Witter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Description: this is a story I wrote while at work today. Its not really a story, its a letter to a guy that I'm in love with. I edited to fit Joey/Pacey. It's only a one shot for now unless I can think of somewhere to go with it. Suggestions are always loved if you like it and think it has potential to turn into more than just a one shot-er. This is my sixth Dawson's Creek story. I'll be writing this as well as Conflicted Love, Love Unrequited and Clueless Affection on here now.

Description: this is a story I wrote while at work today. Its not really a story, its a letter to a guy that I'm in love with. I edited to fit Joey/Pacey. It's only a one shot for now unless I can think of somewhere to go with it. Suggestions are always loved if you like it and think it has potential to turn into more than just a one shot-er. This is my sixth Dawson's Creek story. I'll be writing this as well as Conflicted Love, Love Unrequited and Clueless Affection on here now.

Disclaimer: I may not own the characters but this story is original and from my imagination.

Author's note: this is my sixth try at a Dawson's creek story, be nice to me please. This could either be viewed in Pacey's or Joey's point of view. I'm writing it in Pacey's but it could also be viewed in Joey's if you use your imagination You decide and tell me who you see is as and why please. This is a Pacey/Joey fic, my version of how they got together. Enjoy and review thanks

Chapter #10

You should be ashamed of yourself Pacey J. Witter.

How could you say such things to Joey? I can't believe you right now, I honestly can't. You're upset because Joey found out that she was pregnant and the kid wasn't yours? Grow up! She just had a miscarriage for god sake, show so damn sympathy for the poor girl for god sake. It wasn't exactly her choice to get pregnant. Sometimes these things just happen.

In case your wondering, yes, this is Bessie. I found your letter buried in Joey's dresser drawer the other day while I was doing her laundry. It was unopened thankfully. She must have packed it away and forgot to open it. I'm glad Joey didn't have a chance to read your last letter. It would have damn near killed her Pacey.

Ever since Josephine came back to Capeside a week and a half ago, she has been inquiring about you. Joey is upset over how things went down in New York last month when you came to see her. She has been pacing around the house nonstop wondering whether or not she should go to the Ice House or your place to see you. Joey has been driving me crazy this last week.

She knows that you know she's in town. Joey won't stop asking me why you haven't called or stopped by yet. Unfortunately for her, now I know. I can not believe you Pacey J. Witter. Do you know how much it would have killed Joey if she had read the letter you wrote her? She lost her baby and your sighing a breath of relief at this knowledge? How dare you!

Even after all the crap you two have been through, Joey still thinks the world of you Pacey. Last night I caught her looking at an old photo album of pictures. They were mostly of the two of you. She was flipping through the album and crying to herself. Do you have any idea how much Joey is hurting right now Pacey? Joey would never come out and admit it, but she needs you.

Joey needs you more than ever right now. She miscarried. She's hurting, and even though Joey has us here with her now, its not hard to see that she still feels alone. Fine so maybe Joey screwed up and got pregnant, maybe she was engage briefly to a guy who wasn't you. That is no reason to completely erase her from your life though Pacey.

Joey's still in love with you, its not hard to see this by the way she's constantly asking questions and going on about you. I don't know how many times I have seen Josephine take out her cell phone, dial your number and then hang up once the phone started ringing. I can't stand to see her like this Pace, she's my little sister and I love her.

But knowing that you're the one whose hurting Joey so much? I never in my life would have imagined that I could grow to resent you. But I am. I don't want to because you have helped us out some much throughout the years, but I'm slowly starting to. Nobodies perfect Pacey, we all make mistakes, even Joey. But for you to hold this against her? That is just unforgivable.

I don't know what Joey and you have been fighting about in your letters, let alone what happened last Christmas. Its not my business and I don't care for the details Pacey. But what I do know is that Joey doesn't deserve this. She doesn't deserve to be treated this way. I expected more from you. You say that you want Joey back? Well then prove it.

Be a man Pacey, come talk with Josephine face to face. Put aside your differences. If you love her, this shouldn't be hard to do. Joey wants to be with you, she wants to resolve whatever issues the two of you have. She's afraid to take the first step. If you want her back, than you're just going to have to meet her half way. That's not asking too much Pacey, honestly its not.

In your last letter, you wrote that the reason you broke up with Joey was because you didn't want to hold her back. Did you honestly think that shattering Joey's heart when you knew how much she loved you unconditionally was a better alternative? Josephine never saw you as a failure Pace. No one did, maybe your family might have but Joey didn't and neither did I. Pace, I always knew that you were destined to do great things.

I was right, you were and you have done great things. You have a place of your own, a nice car, you own one of the most successful restaurants in Capeside. How is that a failure? Joey didn't care that you weren't college material Pacey, she really didn't. All she ever wanted since the two of you got together was to be with you.

I can't believe you let your insecurities over not being good enough for Joey, or Dawson for that matter, get the best of you. How could you be so blind Pacey? If you had only opened your eyes, you would have seen that Joey wasn't going anywhere. Her heart has always belonged to you, it always will. Joey doesn't care how much money you make or whether or not you're able to buy her pretty and expensive things, she's never cared about any of those things.

All she ever cared about was you Pacey. Joey never once considered being with you as settling. She wasn't waiting for a better guy to come along. Pace, you were perfect in her eyes. Why couldn't you see that? Maybe if you had, things would be different right now. Joey and you would probably still be together, that much is for sure. Who knows you might have even been engaged.

But because you were so afraid to take a risk, you might never know now Pacey. How do you sleep at night knowing that? I would be going crazy kicking myself in the ass and filled with regret if I were you. You were right, getting into Worthington and out of Capeside was Joey's dream Pacey. But you were wrong when you said she would have regretted giving it up for you.

Joey would have gladly gone to Capeside community college or even Boston University, if it meant that she could be with you. You weren't holding her back from anything Pace, it was all in your head. Just one look and I knew you were destined to do great things with your life, I was certain Joey was as well. Even if she hadn't of gotten a degree from Worthington, Josephine would have still wound up successful at whatever she put her heart and mind to.

You and I both know that Witter. Joey is an incredibly gifted girl. Worthington or not, nothing could ever change that. I'm not going to show Josephine your last letter Pace, it would crush her. But I do think that you're making a big mistake by not coming to see her. Don't punish Joey for something she had no control of. Its not fair to her and I know you're better than that Pacey.

Joey wants to see you Witter, every other word out of her mouth is Pacey this or Pacey that. Its becoming annoying actually. You know how Josephine is though, she's not going to make the first move. She's stubborn, all of us Potter women are. You should know this by now Pace. You have to step up, you have to come to Joey. I know that you will do the right thing, don't let me down Pacey. Please.

I'm sorry that I went off on you the way that I did Pacey, but Josephine is my baby sister. I don't want anything to happen to her. If she ever read your last letter and wound up heart broken, I would have never forgiven you. Talk to Joey, you can't avoid her forever, this is Capeside after all. Its a small town, this isn't New York anymore. You can't just run away from your problems, nor should you.

I trust that you will do the right thing in the end, don't let me down Pacey J. Witter.

Sincerely yours,

Bessie Potter.


	11. Put in my place

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Description: this is a story I wrote while at work today. Its not really a story, its a letter to a guy that I'm in love with. I edited to fit Joey/Pacey. It's only a one shot for now unless I can think of somewhere to go with it. Suggestions are always loved if you like it and think it has potential to turn into more than just a one shot-er. This is my sixth Dawson's Creek story. I'll be writing this as well as Conflicted Love, Love Unrequited and Clueless Affection on here now.

Description: this is a story I wrote while at work today. Its not really a story, its a letter to a guy that I'm in love with. I edited to fit Joey/Pacey. It's only a one shot for now unless I can think of somewhere to go with it. Suggestions are always loved if you like it and think it has potential to turn into more than just a one shot-er. This is my sixth Dawson's Creek story. I'll be writing this as well as Conflicted Love, Love Unrequited and Clueless Affection on here now.

Disclaimer: I may not own the characters but this story is original and from my imagination.

Author's note: this is my sixth try at a Dawson's creek story, be nice to me please. This could either be viewed in Pacey's or Joey's point of view. I'm writing it in Pacey's but it could also be viewed in Joey's if you use your imagination You decide and tell me who you see is as and why please. This is a Pacey/Joey fic, my version of how they got together. Enjoy and review thanks

Chapter #11

Wow if there is anyone that knows how to put me in my place, it is definitely you Bessie Potter.

Right now you have me feeling, oh about two inches tall. You're right, I was a complete jerk in my last letter. I'm glad that Josephine didn't have a chance to read that either, it would have killed her. To be honest, I'm ashamed you ever had the chance to read it as well. I don't know what I was thinking when I wrote Joey that letter.

I had just arrived home from New York, and not three days later a letter arrived from Joey. In it she felt necessary to apologize and explain herself about all that had happened. At the time, her word didn't make much of a difference. I was hurt. I felt betrayed. I was angry with Joey. She had let me down. When I left for New York I was hell bent on making Joey my wife.

Obviously when I returned home alone, I didn't get what I had wanted. Joey came home with that jerk Greg. I was jealous. I was confused. The previous letter she had written to me, Joey mentioned how she and Greg were over. When I saw him with her at her place, something inside me snapped. I lost it when Greg blurted that him and Joey were engaged and she was pregnant.

After hearing that, I didn't know what to say. I didn't even know what to do. All that I knew was that I had to get out of there and quick before I wound up kicking the crap out of that prick. I had to talk with Joey first, I needed to hear it from her. When Josephine confirmed my fears, I was beyond livid. I left without ever giving her a chance to defend or explain herself.

At the time, I didn't want to hear anything that Joey had to say. She was pregnant, she was engaged to a guy that wasn't me. That's all that I needed to hear. Nothing else that your sister could have possibly said would have made a difference. I knew what I knew and didn't want nor need to hear anything else.

Bessie, you have to believe me. If I had known to begin with that Joey had miscarried, I never would have left New York the way that I did. Mad as I was, I would have stayed by her side and done anything that I could to comfort her in her time of need. I know that my last letter doesn't exactly show a lot of sympathy over the fact that Joey miscarried, but I was really upset and hurting when I wrote that.

Its no excuse though. What I wrote Josephine in my last letter really was unforgivable. I'm ashamed at what I wrote. Bess, I'm even more sickened with myself at the sigh of relief I breathed after I read she miscarried. It was incredibly selfish of me to think that way. You're right, Joey couldn't control what happened to her. Its not as though she planned to get knocked up.

I have no right to be angry, or disappointed in her. I'm so glad that its you who read and wrote me. I'm afraid to think what Joey would have said if she'd read my last letter. If you haven't already, I hope that you'll burn that god awful letter in the fireplace. I don't ever want Josephine to see let alone know that I had written it.

It comes to me as no surprise that Joey has been constantly asking about me, Bessie. You're right, she knows that I know she is back in town. In the last letter she wrote me, she'd told me how you basically forced her to come stay with you in Capeside. Not that she minded all that much, Joey would much rather be around family at a time like this. After all she's been through I'm sure an escape from the city and Greg was much needed.

It must be killing Joey that I haven't once called or stopped by since she arrived back. You want the gods honest truth though Bessie? I'm afraid to come and see Joey. I wouldn't know what to say or even how to comfort her. You mentioned how you couldn't count how many times Joey has picked up her cell, dialed my number and then hung up once it began ringing? I have done the exact same thing Bess.

I've done much worse though, do you know how many times I have actually made the drive to your house? I would park halfway up the dirt road, turn my car off and just sit there. It came to the point where I was seriously beginning to become agitated with myself. All that I had to do was open my truck door, walk up the front steps and knock. I couldn't bring myself to do that though.

Every time I place my hand on the door handle, I chickened out, started up my truck and took off. It was becoming a nightly habit. Just the other day I found a photo of your sister and I that you had taken before we went to our junior year anti-prom. Joey looked so beautiful in the photo. Staring at that photo of the two of us brought back a lot of old memories.

I wound up going to sleep with that photo tucked in my shirt pocket just above my heart. I know Josephine thinks the world of me, I do of her as well. I'm still in love with her. Bess, I never stopped loving Joey. Not even for one day. Four years and I still think about her every single day. I'm not sure why Joey still thinks the world of me.

I don't deserve her love anymore Bess. I broke up with her. I let her go. I stomped all over Josephine's heart. And for what? Because I was so damn insecure back then. I still am, always have been when it comes to your sister. Can you blame me though? You and I both know that Joey could do much better than the likes of me.

At the time, when I broke up with your sister, I was convinced that I was doing the right thing. Joey was talking about staying in Capeside and going to community college. I knew that's not what she wanted to do. All she ever talked about was Worthington and leaving Capeside. I didn't want to stand in her way. I didn't want her to give up her dreams for me.

Back then I was convince that I would only wind up disappointing Joey in the long run. I knew it was only a matter of time before she discovered I was a failure, a nothing, a no body. I can't believe I let my damn insecurities get in my way either Bess. After thinking about what you said, I realized that you're absolutely right.

In Joey's eyes, it probably wouldn't have mattered where she went to college as long as I was there beside her. Whether if it were Worthington, Boston University or Capeside community college, Joey still would have wound up exactly where she is right now one way or another. You hit the nail on the head Bessie, your sister is an incredibly gifted girl.

It was wrong of me to think differently of Joey for getting pregnant, you're right Bess. I was a jerk and I'm so sorry that I disappointed you. Joey couldn't control any of what happened, things like that aren't always expected. What your sister went through was horrible, I should have shown more sympathy than I originally did. You're not the only one whose disappointed in me, I am as well.

It comes as no surprise that Joey wants to see me. I would say that I'm shocked that she hasn't called or stopped by, by now. But it would be a lie. You're right, that girl truly is stubborn. She always has been, stubbornness certainly is a Potter women family trait. As much as its one that agitates me, its also one that I have come to admire in the both of you.

Josephine and you have been through a lot together Bessie. You both lost your mother, your father was incarcerated and burnt down the original Ice House, at one point you almost lost your house. Through all of this though, neither of you ever gave up. Joey and you and fought for everything that you now have. I'm so proud of the both of you.

I know that its time Josephine and I talk. Its been a long time coming actually. I've wanted to see Joey ever since I first found out she was coming to town. I'm afraid to though. I'm going to step up though Bess, I'm going to come see Joey and straighten things out between us once and for all. I just need to work up my courage is all. I promise not to take forever Bess.

Word around town is Joey bought a place not far down the road from you. Does this mean she intends to stay in Capeside and work from here? In her last letter, she mentioned how it was an option her editor gave her. She said that were she to stay in Capeside, she would only have to commute back to New York once or twice a month to show her work.

I'm not going to lie, when I heard this I became excited. Having Joey back in Capeside would be great. It would be nice to see her whenever I wanted and not have to travel. Honestly, all that I want to do is work things out with Josephine. She's the only girl I'll ever love, even after all we have been through I still want to marry her.

I know that if I want to work things out with your sister that I'm going to have to take the first step. I fully intend to as well. I'm just going to need a little time to gather my thoughts and courage. I promise that I won't let you down Bessie. Thanks for talking sense in to me, I needed someone too and I'm glad that it was you.

I'm going to do the right thing Bess, and once I get your sister back, if she'll still take me...I'm never going to let her go again. This much I can promise you Bess, I won't let you or Joey down again.

Sincerely yours,

Pacey J. Witter.


	12. Haven't heard from you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Description: this is a story I wrote while at work today. Its not really a story, its a letter to a guy that I'm in love with. I edited to fit Joey/Pacey. It's only a one shot for now unless I can think of somewhere to go with it. Suggestions are always loved if you like it and think it has potential to turn into more than just a one shot-er. This is my sixth Dawson's Creek story. I'll be writing this as well as Conflicted Love, Love Unrequited and Clueless Affection on here now.

Description: this is a story I wrote while at work today. Its not really a story, its a letter to a guy that I'm in love with. I edited to fit Joey/Pacey. It's only a one shot for now unless I can think of somewhere to go with it. Suggestions are always loved if you like it and think it has potential to turn into more than just a one shot-er. This is my sixth Dawson's Creek story. I'll be writing this as well as Conflicted Love, Love Unrequited and Clueless Affection on here now.ll

Disclaimer: I may not own the characters but this story is original and from my imagination.

Author's note: this is my sixth try at a Dawson's creek story, be nice to me please. This could either be viewed in Pacey's or Joey's point of view. I'm writing it in Pacey's but it could also be viewed in Joey's if you use your imagination You decide and tell me who you see is as and why please. This is a Pacey/Joey fic, my version of how they got together. Enjoy and review thanks

Chapter #12

I don't get it Pacey J. Witter, I really...I just don't get it.

Why haven't I seen or heard from you yet? Its been exactly two weeks since I arrived home in Capeside. You haven't stopped by. You haven't called me. Hell, you haven't even written me in almost a month. My only question is, why? Did I do something wrong Pacey? I apologized for everything that happened in New York.

Are you still upset about all that has happened? What do I have to do to get you to speak to me again Pace? Look, I'm really sorry. I wasn't expecting you to drive to New York, let alone for you to propose to me. I know that I screwed things up. But you have to at least give me a chance to fix things. Please? Don't tell me that its too late.

I'm going crazy without you in my life Pacey. I can't think straight. You're constantly on my mind. Your in my dreams at night. Your the first thing I think about when I wake up in the morning and the last before I go to bed. Do you know how many times I have tried to call you and failed? Its becoming more than a little ridiculous.

Right now, I could use you more than ever Pacey. I just had a miscarriage. I'm hurting right now. The only one that I want to comfort me, is you. This distance between us is growing and I don't want it to anymore. All I want is to be with you. I know that you still want to be with me too Pace. You bought me an engagement ring. Don't let one little mishap drive the two of us even further apart.

You and I were happy when we were together. Since we broke up four years ago, I have been miserable. Its as though I have just been going through the motions. Last Christmas when I saw you, I knew that I wasn't over you. I'm still not over you Witter. If I were to be honest, I don't think that I will ever move on from you.

You want to know the sad thing Pacey? I don't even remember why you and I were fighting when I came to see you last Christmas. Seriously, I don't. Looking back, it doesn't even matter what we were fighting about. We were both wrong Pace. I came to see you Christmas eve, because I wanted to smooth things over. We had been getting along those last few months before Christmas.

I figured, what better time to get back together than Christmas. When I first arrived at your place, things were going great. We were both laughing, talking and drinking. Than the next thing that I knew, you and I were at each others throats. I have no idea what the hell happened. All that I remember is storming from your house, sitting in my car and crying for hours because I was too drunk to drive home.

When you wrote me this past Christmas, I was surprised. Honestly I wasn't expecting to hear from you. Sure we were speaking to one another again, but we weren't exactly on the closest of terms. I had all but moved on when I received your letter this past Christmas. I was seeing Greg, things were serious with us. For the most part I was happy.

After reading your Christmas letter, I began to miss you all over again. I was confused. Should I write you back or pretend I never read or received your letter? I didn't want to write you off completely so I decided to write you in return. Greg didn't like the thought of me writing you. He knew all about you and our history. Bessie much to my displeasure filled him in about the two of us when I was home with him for Thanks Giving.

When Greg found out that I stayed in contact with you Pacey, he became more than a little jealous. He was convinced that I still had feelings for you. Even though I told him otherwise, its not as though I could lie to myself. Of course I still have feelings for you. Why wouldn't I? You were the one who broke up with me, it wasn't exactly a mutual parting.

It wasn't long before Greg and I started arguing. Our fights were always the same, he didn't like the fact that I called you or wrote you back. At one point he was convinced that I was seeing you behind his back. I tried reasoning with him, telling him that it would be impossible for me to see you without him knowing. He wouldn't hear anything that I had to say though.

Not long after the New Year, Greg and I finally broke up. I had gotten tired of having the same fight over and over again. A few weeks after we had broken up is when I found out that I was pregnant. At first, I was scared. I didn't know what to do, I knew abortion wasn't an option. Then after I let the thought sink in, I began to get excited.

When Greg and I were together, he was always talking about marriage. I figured of all the people to be knocked up by, aside from you that is, that Greg would be the most understanding. I'd spent all afternoon trying to get a hold of him, when I finally found Greg and told him the news his reaction was the opposite of what I had expected.

When I told Greg, I was pregnant and it was his, the first thing he asked was if I was keeping the baby. I was beyond infuriated. The fact that he even asked me that made me want to hit him. Before I made a scene, I took off from the restaurant we were at instead. I'd caught a cab and headed back to my apartment.

Well, you know the rest of it Pacey. For the most part you were there, and what you didn't know I'm sure you found out when you read my last letter. It comes as no surprise that Greg and I are over once and for all. When I left to talk with you, Greg made good on his promise not to be there when I got back. I haven't heard from him since, every time that I have tried calling him to apologize, I go straight to his voice mail.

If Greg wanted to work things out with me, I would have heard from him by now. Truth is, I don't want to work things out with Greg. I would much rather rekindle things with you Pacey. You're the only one that I want to be with. Ever since we broke up, I have just been going through the motions. Every guy that I have been with, has never compared to you.

No guy ever will, I was hoping you and I could work things out. Its taken a lot of thinking, but I have decided to move back to Capeside. There is no reason for me to be in New York anymore, my publicist told me I could commute back and forth twice a month to show her my work. I bought a place not far up the road from Bessie.

I'm closing on the house around the middle of the month. Bessie and Bodie are going to help me start moving my things in by the end of February. I'm hoping to be all settled in by the begining of March. I'm not saying that you have to come visit me, but I really wish that you would. I miss you Pacey. I want you back in my life, please don't write me out of yours? I need you Pacey.

Promise me you'll at least consider coming to see or at least calling me? I don't want there to be this wedge between us anymore Pacey J. Witter...I love you and I always will.

Sincerely yours,

Josephine Lynn Potter. …...

Folding up the letter I had just written, I stuff it into an envelope. Carefully sealing it closed, I simply write on the front Pacey J. Witter. I don't bother signing that the letter is from me. Pacey will figure that out as soon as he opens the envelope if not before. Feeling braver than usual, I walk out of the Potter's B&B and open up the front door of my truck. Climbing inside, I quietly start up the engine and drive off down the dirt road in the direction of Pacey's place.

Its not long after seven o'clock on Friday night. This is one of the Ice Houses' busiest nights. I know for a fact that Pacey won't be home, not when the restaurant is swamped. Slowly pulling up the dirt path to Pacey's place, I breath a sigh of relief when I find his jeep isn't in the driveway. Placing my truck in park, I stare up at his house.

After sitting in the truck for almost an hour and chickening out more than a few times, I reluctantly open my truck door. Carefully stepping out, I grab the letter I had just written Pacey. Still hesitant, it takes me a few minutes more before I'm brave enough to walk up Pacey's front steps. Placing the letter through his mail holder, I sigh heavily to myself.

There I did it, the rest is up to Pacey now. Turning on my heel, I take off back toward my truck but not before a familiar voice stops me. " Taking off so soon are we Potter? What's the matter? Can't knock and say hello?", I hear them call from the doorsteps behind me. …...


	13. Didn't think you were home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Description: this is a story I wrote while at work today. Its not really a story, its a letter to a guy that I'm in love with. I edited to fit Joey/Pacey. It's only a one shot for now unless I can think of somewhere to go with it. Suggestions are always loved if you like it and think it has potential to turn into more than just a one shot-er. This is my sixth Dawson's Creek story. I'll be writing this as well as Conflicted Love, Love Unrequited and Clueless Affection on here now.

Description: this is a story I wrote while at work today. Its not really a story, its a letter to a guy that I'm in love with. I edited to fit Joey/Pacey. It's only a one shot for now unless I can think of somewhere to go with it. Suggestions are always loved if you like it and think it has potential to turn into more than just a one shot-er. This is my sixth Dawson's Creek story. I'll be writing this as well as Conflicted Love, Love Unrequited and Clueless Affection on here now.

Disclaimer: I may not own the characters but this story is original and from my imagination.

Author's note: this is my sixth try at a Dawson's creek story, be nice to me please. This could either be viewed in Pacey's or Joey's point of view. I'm writing it in Pacey's but it could also be viewed in Joey's if you use your imagination You decide and tell me who you see is as and why please. This is a Pacey/Joey fic, my version of how they got together. Enjoy and review thanks

Chapter #13

(Previously)

…...Folding up the letter I had just written, I stuff into an envelope Carefully sealing it closed, I simply write on the front Pacey J. Witter. I don't bother signing that the letter is from me. Pacey will figure that out as soon as he opens the envelope if not before. Feeling braver than usual, I walk out of the Potter's B&B and open up the front door of my truck. Climbing inside, I quietly start up the engine and drive off down the dirt road in the direction of Pacey's place.

Its not long after seven o'clock on Friday night. This is one of the Ice Houses busiest nights. I know for a fact that Pacey won't be home, not when the restaurant is swamped Slowly pulling up the dirt path to Pacey's place, I breath a sigh of relief when I find his jeep isn't in the driveway. Placing my truck in park, stare stare up at his house.

After sitting in the truck for almost an hour and almost chickening out more than a few times. I reluctantly open my truck door. Carefully stepping out, I grab the letter I had just written Pacey. Still hesitant, it takes me a few minutes more before I'm brave enough to talk up Pacey's front steps. Placing the letter through his mail holder, I sigh heavily to myself.

There I did it, the rest is up to Pacey now. Turning on my heel, I take off back toward my truck but not before a familiar voice stops me. " Taking off so soon are we Potter? Whats the matter? Can't knock and say hello?", I hear them call from the doorsteps behind me. …...

(Currently)

Crap! It seems that I have been caught red handed. Slowly turning around in my tracks, I see none other than Jack standing in the doorway of Pacey's house. Not far behind him is Amy, Joseph and Dougie. Damn, what the hell am I supposed to do now? Its not as though I can exactly turn and run. There's no signs of Pacey at least, I'm in the clear that much.

Not knowing what else to do, I offer a smile before I happily exclaim," Jack, hey! I didn't think anyone was home or I would have knocked."

" Joey! Joey, Joey, Joey!", yells Joseph excitedly before running out of the house and hugging my leg. With a laugh, I pick him in my arms and spin around.

" Woooow, look how much you have grown since I last saw you Joseph!", I joke before ruffling his hair playfully. This in turn causes Joseph to laugh and squirm around in my arms.

" Joey, did you bring me back anything from New York? Did you? Huh, did you?", asks Joseph with a gigantic smile on his face. Laughing to myself, I set him down on the ground once more. Before I know whats happening, Jack nearly tackles me in a hug.

" Whoa, easy Jack. I've missed you too. Actually Joseph, I do have something for you and Amy but its not with me. I'll bring it with me the next time I see you.", I reassure before once again messing up Joseph's hair. It amazes me how much this little guy resembles Pacey. If I didn't know any better I would say Jack and Dougie adopted Pacey's son. That's ridiculous though, because Pacey doesn't have any kids.

" You know Joey, if you're looking for Pacey, he's not home. Its Friday night, he's stuck at the Ice House all night. Pacey won't be home til at least eleven o'clock. The only reason we're here is because Pacey offered to watch the kiddies for the weekend so Jack and I could have a weekend getaway.", informs Dougie as he walks down to greet me with Amy in toe. Its hard to believe that little Amy is already three years old. She was only one when Jen died, she'll probably have no memories of her mother. Amy might not remember Jen, but she will know her. With the way we always talk about Jen as if she were still here, Amy will feel like she never lost her mother.

" Oh, no. I know Dougie, that's actually why I chose today to stop by. I was hoping Pacey wouldn't be here when I dropped this off. The last thing that I want is to start up world war...well to be honest I've kind of lost count. Every time I think that we're about to resolve things, something happens to ruin whatever progress we were making.", I admit with a laugh and roll of my eyes. Running into Pacey is the last thing that I want right now. Not after I haven't heard from him in almost a month. The last time I spoke with or saw Pacey was in New York. That was a mess that didn't end well. If I had known Pacey was on his way from Capeside to propose? I would have told him to stay where he was. Unfortunately, I didn't have a chance to read his letter until it was too late. By then the damage had been done. Pacey left New York angry and in a hurry. Once I admitted that yes I was pregnant and engaged to Greg, he didn't give me a chance to explain. Pacey was gone before I could ever stop him.

" About that, Joey...what happened in New York? When Pacey left a few weeks ago to drive down and see you, he was hell bent on proposing to you. Pacey said that he refused to leave New York until you agreed to be his wife. He was convinced that it was the perfect time to ask for your hand. Pacey said in one of your letters you had mentioned how you ended things with that guy you were seeing. He didn't want to risk losing you to anyone else Joe. After Pacey blew his chance to propose to you last Christmas, he didn't want to let this chance slip by. He was convinced if he did, there wouldn't be another. When Pacey left for New York, he was excited and couldn't wait to see the look on your face when he got down on one knee and popped the question. Then when he came back to Capeside, Dougie and I asked him how things went and he just refused to talk about it. He hasn't brought you or that day up since Joey. Why aren't the two of you engaged right now?", questions Jack much to my displeasure. Oh, crap. Great. Thanks for effectively putting me on the spot Jack. What am I supposed to say? I can't exactly lie to Dougie or Jack, they'll know if I'm not telling the truth. With all eyes suddenly on me, I don't really have much of a choice but to explain what went down in New York earlier this month.

" You really have no clue what happened when Pacey went to see me in New York?", I inquire as a stall tactic hoping to by myself some time and possibly steer this topic off course altogether. If these two don't already know what happened, I really don't want to tell them. The last thing I want is Jack and Dougie's sympathy. I really just want to move forward with my life and forget about that god awful day.

" Not even a clue Joey, he refused to talk about it. We're clueless, think maybe you could fill us in?", questions Dougie with raised eyebrows before picking Amy up in his arms. Damn, their not going to let things go are they? Guess I don't really have a choice in the matter. I'm backed into a corner. I have a feeling by the end of the night, I'm going to be distraught and crying once again. Ugh, I thought that I was done with all the damn tears.

" Alright, well I was hoping that I wouldn't have to have this conversation again anytime soon but its not exactly something that I can run from. Not when everyone keeps asking the same questions over and over again. Pacey was right, I had broken up with Greg, the guy I was seeing. He was jealous of Pacey and I grew tired of having the same fight with him repeatedly. I broke up with Greg a few days after New Years. Not even two and a half weeks after I ended things with him, I had come to the realization that I was nearly a month and a half late. With all the fighting with Greg and arguing with Pacey, I never noticed that I missed my period. A pregnancy test confirmed my worst fears, I was pregnant.", I start off hesitantly not really wanting to go on any further. Biting down on my bottom lip, I force back the tears that are stinging the back of my eyes. I really don't feel like reliving this all over again, not now. I'm beginning to think coming here was a huge mistake.

" Whoa, Joey...you're pregnant?! Congratulations!", exclaims Jack with a huge smile on his face as he carefully hugs me once again. Confused when I don't return the gesture, I avert my eyes toward the ground quickly in hopes he doesn't see the hurt that's reflected in them.

" You're probably going to want to hold off on congratulating me, Jack. I'm not even closed to finished with the story.", I point out with a tired sigh. With a simple nod of his head both Jack and Dougie silently urge me to continue," After the pregnancy tests that I took all came up positive, the shock set in. Not long after, fear took over and I began to panic. I was actually pregnant, worse than that I was single. I was scared with no clue what to do. I knew for a fact that the baby was Greg's, against my better judgment I had spent the entire day trying to find him. Once I finally found Greg, I told him the news. The first words out of his mouth were if I was going to keep it. I was furious, abortion wasn't even an option in my mind. Not wanting to cause a scene, I stormed off and went back to my apartment. Not long after I went to sleep that night I had began experiencing severe abdominal pains. At first, I tried to ignore them and go back to sleep. It didn't take long for them to become more frequent and painful. When I got up to go to the bathroom, I had realized that I was bleeding. I panicked and drove myself straight to the emergency room. I had no idea what was going on. Once I got to the hospital, I had to wait two hours for a doctor to see me. When the doctor finally came to examine me, he asked what was wrong and I told him. I explained how I had just recently found out I was expecting, that I was a month and a half late. That's when the doctor grew quiet and lowered his head. I asked him what was wrong and that's when he told me, I...I had a miscarriage. After I had left the hospital, I sat in my car crying for three hours. By the time I finally made it back to my apartment, Greg was there waiting for me. He begged me to forgive him and when I finally relented he got down on one knee and proposed to me. When I started crying all over again he asked me what was wrong so I told him. Not wanting to be alone, I asked Greg if he would stay over. The next morning when we returned to my apartment after breakfast, Pacey was there waiting. Jack, Dougie, you have to believe me when I tell that you I had no idea Pacey was coming to see me. I didn't have a chance to read his letter until it was too late. Before I knew what was happening, Greg blurted out that I was pregnant and we were engaged. Pacey didn't want to take his word, so he asked to speak to me alone. When I confirmed everything Greg had said, Pacey took off before I could say anything else. H-he just left without even looking back. I wrote a letter explaining everything to Pacey and how I would be coming back to Capeside, but I haven't heard from him since that day in New York.", I explain with my eyes cast downward. I just unloaded a mouthful on Jack and Dougie, the last thing I want is to see the look in their eyes after I just told them I miscarried. Its becoming increasingly hard not to break down here right in front of them. If I don't leave soon I'm afraid that I just might.

" Oh, geez. Joey, you miscarried? Crap. I didn't know, Pacey wouldn't say anything about that day. Had I known, I never would have asked.", apologizes Dougie with the exact sympathetic look I had been dreading. This is why I didn't want to say anything. This is the last thing that I want, I don't need Jack, Dougie, Bessie or anyone else to feel sorry for me. All I want is to grieve in peace and move on. The more I discuss what happened, the more miserable I become.

" You could always adopt me and Amy and be our mommy Jojo.", offers Joseph with a bright beaming smile on his face all the while. Revealing a sad smirk of my own when both Joseph and Amy wrap their arms around my legs, I can't help but chuckle. Jack and Dougie don't know how good they have it with these two, they're really great kids. I've come to think of those two as my own nephew and niece, Jack might as well be family. He and Dougie made me Joseph's god mother, a privilege all its own.

" Aww, thanks you two. It would be an honor. I'm going to have to bring Alexander over to play with the both of you soon. But right now I'm afraid that I have to go, so give me a quick kiss on the cheek you little rug rats.", I tease before picking the both of them up in my arms. Placing a kiss on Joseph and Amy's cheeks, I give them both a squeeze before setting them down once more.

" You sure that you don't want to stay Joey? Pacey should be home in another hour or so, we wouldn't mind the company. Amy seems to be really taken with you right now, she refuses to let go of your leg.", jokes Jack with an awkward laugh trying not to come off as too concerned. Too late, I know that their both wanting to know if I'm alright. Truth is, I'm not. I haven't been for a while. I'm not ready to face Pacey, he hasn't written, called or visited me since I last saw him in New York. The way I see it, if Pacey wants to see me, he has to make the first move. Not me.

" No, its fine really. I should probably get back, I snuck out without telling Bessie or Bodie where I was going. Between the two of them, they're probably worried sick about me and wondering where I am. Could you just make sure that Pacey gets that letter, please? Its kind of important. I don't want to be here when he gets home. If Pacey wants to see me, I would much rather that he made the first move and not me. It was nice seeing the both of you again, we'll have to get together for dinner sometime with everyone. It will be fun having everybody under the same roof again.", I offer with a laugh before opening my truck door. Climbing inside, I start the engine.

Saying goodbye to the four of them once more, I take off up the dirt road once more. Stopping briefly at the end of Pacey's driveway, I turn and start down the road in the opposite direction of my house. I know that I said I was going home, but I just can't bring myself to just yet. Driving up and down the streets of Capeside, its not long before I find myself parked by the docks. Turning off my truck, I lean my head against the steering wheel. Its not long before the tears start flowing down my cheeks. Closing my eyes tightly, I will them away with no such luck. They continue to fall freely with no chance of stopping anytime soon. Shaking with sobs, I reach into the glove department and pull out the positive pregnancy test from that day and simply stare at it through tear filled eyes. I can't help wondering who he or she would have been, let alone what they would have looked like or what it would have felt like to hold them in my arms. Not wanting to return home teary eyed, and red faced, I decide its best to sit here and regain my composure for a while. Bessie and Bodie are bound to be mad when I return, but I can't face them like this, not tonight...not again. …...


	14. Missed communications

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Description: this is a story I wrote while at work today. Its not really a story, its a letter to a guy that I'm in love with. I edited to fit Joey/Pacey. It's only a one shot for now unless I can think of somewhere to go with it. Suggestions are always loved if you like it and think it has potential to turn into more than just a one shot-er. This is my sixth Dawson's Creek story. I'll be writing this as well as Conflicted Love, Love Unrequited and Clueless Affection on here now.

Description: this is a story I wrote while at work today. Its not really a story, its a letter to a guy that I'm in love with. I edited to fit Joey/Pacey. It's only a one shot for now unless I can think of somewhere to go with it. Suggestions are always loved if you like it and think it has potential to turn into more than just a one shot-er. This is my sixth Dawson's Creek story. I'll be writing this as well as Conflicted Love, Love Unrequited and Clueless Affection on here now.

Disclaimer: I may not own the characters but this story is original and from my imagination.

Author's note: this is my sixth try at a Dawson's creek story, be nice to me please. This could either be viewed in Pacey's or Joey's point of view. I'm writing it in Pacey's but it could also be viewed in Joey's if you use your imagination You decide and tell me who you see is as and why please. This is a Pacey/Joey fic, my version of how they got together. Enjoy and review thanks

Chapter #14

(previously)

…..." You sure that you don't want to stay Joey? Pacey should be home in another hour or so, we wouldn't mind the company. Amy seems to be really taken with you right now, she refuses to let go of your leg.", jokes Jack with an awkward laugh trying not to come off as too concerned. Too late, I know that their both wanting to know if I'm alright. Truth is, I'm not. I haven't been for a while. I'm not ready to face Pacey, he hasn't written, called or visited me since I last saw him in New York. The way I see it, if Pacey wants to see me, he has to make the first move. Not me.

" No, its finally really. I should probably get back, I snuck out without telling Bessie or Bodie where I was going. Between the two of them, they're probably worried sick about me and wondering where I am. Could you just make sure that Pacey gets that letter, please? Its kind of important. I don't want to be here when he gets home. If Pacey wants to see me, I would much rather that he made the first move and not me. It was nice seeing the both of you again, we'll have to get together for dinner sometime with everyone. It will be fun having everybody under the same roof again.", I offer with a laugh before opening my truck door. Climbing inside, I start the engine.

Saying goodbye to the four of them once more, I take off up the dirt road once more. Stopping briefly at the end of Pacey's driveway, I turn and start down the road in the opposite direction of my house. I know that I said I was going home, but I just can't bring myself to just yet. Driving up and down the streets of Capeside, its not long before I find myself parked by the docks. Turning off my truck, I lean my head against the steering wheel. Its not long before the tears start flowing down my cheeks. Closing my eyes tightly, I will them away with no such luck. They continue to fall freely with no chance of stopping anytime soon. Shaking with sobs, I reach into the glove department and pull out the positive pregnancy test from that day and simply stare at it through tear filled eyes. I can't help wondering who he or she would have been, let alone what the would have looked like or what it would have felt like to hold them in my arms. Not wanting to return home teary eyed, and red faced, I decide its best to sit here and regain my composure for a while. Bessie and Bodie are bound to be mad when I return, but I can't face them like this, not tonight...not again. …...

(Currently)

" Hey boss man, are you heading out early? Its only eight-thirty.", asks George one of my newest waiters. Ah, damn. I was hoping to sneak out of here without anyone knowing. We're busy tonight like always but I put my assistant Timothy in charge for the rest of the night. I need to get out of here. All I can think about right now is going to see Joey. Every time I think that I finally have the chance to, something always comes up. If I don't go tonight, I don't know when I'll have the chance to. I'm off this weekend but I'm on baby sitting duty for Dougie and Jack so they can finally have some alone time.

" Uh, yeah. Actually I am, George. I put Timothy in charge for the rest of tonight, did you need something?", I inquire with a hesitant sigh before glancing down at my watch. I don't want to take too much longer, it would be rude if I went over knocking on the Potter's door too late. Especially since there are guests staying there currently.

" No, I'm good. I just wanted to thank you for the extra hours. I could really use them. Have a good night boss man.", jokes George before patting me on the shoulder. Letting out a breath of relief, I say my goodbyes quickly and make my exit before anyone else has a chance to stop me.

Walking out the front door of the restaurant, I make my way to my jeep. Opening the drivers door, I climb inside. Reaching into the glove department, I pull out a white envelope with Josephine Lynn Potter scrolled across the front. I wrote this letter nearly a week ago and never had the heart to mail it out. Truth is, I would much rather hand it to Joey in person. Reaching into my shirt pocket, I pull out a tiny heart shaped box. Flipping the lid open reveals a heart shaped diamond engagement ring. This is the ring I bought for Joey before last Christmas.

I was going to propose to her last Christmas eve, unfortunately I never had the chance. Potter and I wound up fighting instead. After all that time, I still have it. I'm not about to bring it back. Earlier this month I went to New York once again try to propose to Josephine. Boy did that blow up in my face. Things didn't go as planned once again. When I arrived in New York, Joey was with none other than that jerk Greg.

Once he revealed Joey was pregnant and they were engaged, I nearly lost it. Not wanting to take his word, I had to hear it for Joey. Once she confirmed my fears, I took off before she ever had a chance to explain herself. It wasn't until shortly after I returned to Capeside that I received a letter from Joey explaining everything that happened. When I read Joey had a miscarriage, I felt like a jerk at the sigh of relief I breathed.

I haven't written, called or spoken to Joey since. Truth is I have been hesitant. History shows that Potter and I don't have the best luck when it comes to attempting to talk things out. Last thing I want to do is have another argument with her. I can't avoid Joey forever though. Its time that I go over to the Potter's B&B and see her once and for all.

Turning the key in my ignition, I start up the jeep and pull out of the Ice House parking lot. Driving through the streets of Capeside, I navigate my way toward the Potter's B&B. Its not long before I find myself pulling up the familiar dirt path to Joey's house. Putting my jeep in park, I stare up at Joey's house quietly. I can't seem to make myself get out of this damn jeep. After sitting for a half hour, I finally gather enough courage to climb out of my jeep. Placing the heart shaped box back into my shirt pocket, I grab the letter I had written for Joey and stuff it in my jeans pocket. Walking up the porch steps, I stand outside the front door hesitantly. It takes me a few minutes before I finally decide to knock. Raising my fist toward the door, it opens before I ever get the chance to knock.

" Hey Witter, were you ever going to come inside? You have only been parked out here for thirty minutes.", teases Bessie with a smile as she holds the door open and lets me inside. Its not long until Alexander comes racing downstairs at the sound of my name.

" Pacey, Pacey, Pacey! I knew you would come visit me eventually, did you bring me any of your delicious apple pie from the Ice House like you promised?", asks Alexander with a giddy smirk on his face as he jumps into my arms. With a laugh, I stumble back a few steps. Whoooa, looks like someone has sure missed uncle Pacey. This kid gets taller every time I see him I swear.

" Hey Alexander, whats going on little buddy? Of course I brought my favorite pal some pie. Its out in my jeep.", I acknowledge with a growing grin as he hugs me tightly. Placing a kiss on Alexander's forehead, I set him down once more.

" Yes! I knew you wouldn't forget Pacey. Mom could I please go out to uncle Pacey's car and grab my slice of pie? Pleeeease?", begs Alexander with his famous puppy dog eyes as a secret weapon. Shaking my head with laughter, I smile at his enthusiasm. Wow his aunt Joey really taught him well, I never could resist those big sad pleading eyes.

" Only if you promise to save me a bite Alexander.", jokes Bessie with a chuckle as the both of us watch Alexander race out to my jeep. Its not long before she catches me looking around for Joey. With a raised eyebrow, Bessie inquires," Am I to assume that your looking for a certain miss Josephine?"

" Yeah, you caught me. I have been meaning to stop by all week Bess, I promise. Every time I thought I would be able to, something would come up last minute.", I explain with a frown before once again looking around for any signs of Joey. Is she even here? Why hasn't Joey shown herself yet? She had to have heard Alexander screaming when I arrived.

" Well, Pace. I wish that I knew where Joey was but I don't unfortunately. She must have snuck off while Bodie and I were cooking dinner earlier. I haven't seen Joey since before about seven o'clock. When I noticed she was nowhere to be found I checked outside and her truck was gone. I tried calling her cell phone, she's not answering though. I have no idea where she went. Joey couldn't have gone far though, she probably just went for a drive. You're welcome to wait for her if you want. Alexander loves spending time with you. You're one of his favorite people.", points out Bessie before walking into the kitchen and pouring four glasses of milk. Its not long before Bodie enters the kitchen with Alexander not far behind carrying a small box of pie.

" Hey Pacey, are you here for Joey? She's not here right now, we think she took a drive. Joey left without telling Bessie or me. When that girl gets back she's going to get an earful from the both of us.", acknowledges Bodie as he searches through the cabinets for plates and forks. Damn, I finally come to see Potter and she's not even here? Isn't that just ducky? I guess that I could afford to wait a little bit. It is only nine-thirty after all.

" Pacey are you here to propose to aunt Jojo? If she says yes, do you think that I could be your best man? I already have a speech written, my mom helped me with it.", gushes Alexander as he climbs into the chair next to me. Damn, all eyes are on me now. What am I supposed to do? I was just called out by a seven year old. Thanks for putting me on the spot Alexander.

"...Aren't you going to answer him, Pace?", urges Bessie with an arched eyebrow when I don't say anything right away. What am I supposed to say? I have the ring in my shirt pocket. I'm not going to lie, the thought did cross my mind more than once. I can't exactly lie to Bessie or Bodie.

" Well, the thought has crossed my mind Alexander. But keep in mind, even if I asked it doesn't mean Joey would say yes.", I admit before taking a sip from my glass of milk. Truth is, I don't know if Potter even wants to marry me anymore. She hasn't heard from me in almost a month. Who am I to just pop the question and expect her to say yes?

" Are you kidding Pacey? Aunt Jojo is in love with you. Of course she will say yes, why wouldn't she? Ever since she came home from New York, she has been driving the rest of us crazy wondering why you haven't called or stopped by? Her constant yammering was getting on my nerves, couldn't you have come by sooner so she would have stopped asking about you?", questions Alexander as he digs into his slice of pie. This in turn causes both Bessie and Bodie to burst out in laughter and agreement with their son. Wow, Joey has wanted to see me this entire time? Here I was only hesitant because I was convinced she would have wanted nothing to do with me. Guess I was wrong all along.

" I have been meaning to, trust me little man, I have been meaning to.", I assure with a smile as I poke at my own slice of pie. I really wish that Josephine were here. I want to see her, to hold her, to kiss her, and console her more than ever. I miss Joey, I miss everything about her.

" You're welcome to wait as long as you want Pacey, your always welcome in our home. You're family man.", confides Bodie as he pats me on my back. That means a lot coming from Bodie. Bessie, Alexander and him have always been considered family in my eyes. Much as I would love to stay and wait all night for Joey to come home, I can only wait a little while before I have to leave. I promised Jack and Dougie that I would be home by eleven-thirty the latest. That is just two hours from now. Hopefully Potter returns before then. If not I could always make a play date for Joseph and Amy to come see Alexander tomorrow. I have been meaning to for a while actually.

(An hour or so later)

The last hour has been spent catching up with Bessie and Bodie aside from playing with Alexander. I haven't seen the three of them since before I left to go see Josephine last month in New York. Speaking of Potter, she's still not here as of yet. I can wait any longer either. Unfortunately, I have to get going. I'm disappointed to say the least. I was really hoping to see Joey tonight.

Standing up from my seat, I reluctantly grab my coat. Picking up Alexander, I give him a big hug and kiss on the forehead once more. Fidgeting in my arms when I tickle him playfully, Alexander accidently knocks the heart shaped ring box from my pocket. Before I even have a chance to set Alexander down, Bessie swoops in and picks up the box. Examining it closely, I groan inwardly when she opens it. Cringing at Bessie's surprised gasp, I quickly lower my gaze toward the ground as she asks," Oh my god, is this what I think it is Pacey? Were you going to propose to my little sister tonight?"

" To be honest Bess, yeah I was. As you can see, I never got the chance though. She's not home and I have to go. Could you please do me a favor though?", I ask as I reach into my front pocket and pull out the envelope with Joey's name scrolled on front. Without a second thought, I hand it along with a single rose to Bessie as I then inquire," Could you please place this letter, rose and that jewelry box on your sister's nightstand beside her bed? I really wanted to propose to Josephine in person after we talked with all of you here. But I have to get going. To be honest, I'm afraid to know her answer now that I don't even know where she is. If she comes back here, could you have Joey call me after she reads my letter and sees the ring I bought for her last Christmas?"

" Yeah, sure. Of course Pacey, whatever you want man. I hope this doesn't mean you're going to deprive us of kneeling down on one knee and asking Joey properly though.", warns Bodie in a stern tone with a warm smile. Sighing in relief at his and Bessie's understanding, I quickly shake my head no. Of course, not that was my plan for tonight. I simply want Potter to know my intentions are true and sincere is all. I fully intend on getting down on one knee if Joey still wants a future with me.

" You have my word that I will, so long as Joey agrees to be my wife and make me a happy man.", I promise before shaking Bodie's hand as he firmly pats me on the back. All I want is to come home to Joey for the rest of my life. If she says yes, I'll be the happiest man alive.

" I'll put these on aunt Jojo's bed stand for you uncle Pacey, you can count on me. I won't lose anything I promise. Remember, when Jojo says yes I get to be your best man right?", questions Alexander with an eager grin. With a simple nod of my head, I can't help laughing at the little guys enthusiasm. It would be an honor to have the little tike as my best man if Joey says yes.

" Of course you could be my best man if Joey says yes, Alexander. I wouldn't dare ask anyone else. I really should be going now though. I promised Jack and Dougie I would come right home after work so they could leave. I'll bring Joseph and Amy over tomorrow to play with you, promise Alexander. I'll see you guys then.", I assure before giving the three of them another round of hugs. Saying goodbye once more, I turn to leave.

Walking down the front steps to my jeep, I open the driver door. Climbing inside, I start the engine once more. Driving down the dirt path from Joey's, I make my way home. Its not long before I'm parked outside my house. Sitting outside for a few minutes, I reluctantly walk inside. Its quiet when I walk in. Amy and Joseph are fast asleep on the couch. Carefully scooping the two of them up in my arms, I carry them upstairs to the guest room and place them in their beds. Walking downstairs, I greet Jack and Dougie. After apologizing for being a little late, I send them on their way. I don't bother explaining that I went to try and see Joey tonight, I don't want to hold those two up anymore. Offering to watch Amy and Joseph til Monday since I'm off then, I smirk at their thankful smiles. Sighing as they grab their bags to leave, I kick out of my shoes before heading upstairs. I stop in my tracks when I hear Jack call over his shoulder," Oh, hey Pace. Before I forget, Potter came by earlier. She asked Dougie and I to give you this. You should go see her man, its not hard to see she misses you Witter. Thanks again for watching the little tikes for us, you're the best man." …...


	15. Where were you, he stopped by

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> True love

Description: this is a story I wrote while at work today. Its not really a story, its a letter to a guy that I'm in love with. I edited to fit Joey/Pacey. It's only a one shot for now unless I can think of somewhere to go with it. Suggestions are always loved if you like it and think it has potential to turn into more than just a one shot-er. This is my sixth Dawson's Creek story. I'll be writing this as well as Conflicted Love, Love Unrequited and Clueless Affection on here now.

Disclaimer: I may not own the characters but this story is original and from my imagination.

Author's note: this is my sixth try at a Dawson's creek story, be nice to me please. This could either be viewed in Pacey's or Joey's point of view. I'm writing it in Pacey's but it could also be viewed in Joey's if you use your imagination You decide and tell me who you see is as and why please. This is a Pacey/Joey fic, my version of how they got together. Enjoy and review thanks

Chapter #15

(Previously)

…...Standing up from my seat, I reluctantly grab my coat. Picking up Alexander, I give him a big hug and kiss on the forehead once more. Fidgeting in my arms when I tickle him playfully, Alexander accidently knocks the heart shaped ring box from my pocket. Before I even have a chance to set Alexander down, Bessie swoops in and picks up the box. Examining it closely, I groan inwardly when she opens it. Cringing at Bessie's surprised gasp, I quickly lower my gaze toward the ground as she asks," Oh my god, is this what I think it is Pacey? Were you going to propose to my little sister tonight?"

" To be honest Bess, yeah I was. As you can see, I never got the chance though. She's not home and I have to go. Could you please do me a favor though?", I ask as I reach into my front pocket and pull the envelope with Joey's name scrolled on front. Without a second thought, I hand it along with a single rose to Bessie as I then inquire," Could you please place this letter, rose and that jewelry box on your sister's nightstand beside her bed? I really wanted to propose to Josephine in person after we talked with all of you here. But I have to get going. To be honest, I'm afraid to know her answer now that I don't even now where she is. If she comes back here, could you have Joey call me after she reads my letter and sees the ring I bought for her last Christmas?"

" Yeah, sure. Of course Pacey, whatever you want man. I hope this doesn't mean you're going to deprive us of kneeling down on one knee and asking Joey properly though.", warns Bodie in a stern tone with a warm smile. Sighing in relief at his and Bessie's understanding, I quickly shake me head no. Of course, not that was my plan for tonight. I simply want Potter to know my intentions are true and sincere is all. I fully intend on getting down on one knee if Joey still wants a future with me.

" You have my word that I will, so long as Joey agrees to be my wife and make me a happy man.", I promise before shaking Bodie's hand as he firmly pats me on the back. All I want is to come home to Joey for the rest of my life. If she says yes, I'll be the happiest man alive.

" I'll put these on aunt Jojo's bed stand for you uncle Pacey, you can count on me. I won't lose anything I promise. Remember, when Jojo says yes I get to be your best man right?", questions Alexander with an eager grin. With a simple nod of my head, I can't help laughing at the little guys enthusiasm. It would be an honor to have the little tike as my best man if Joey says yes.

" Of course you could be my best man if Joey says yes, Alexander. I wouldn't dare ask anyone else. I really should be going now though. I promised Jack and Dougie I would come right home after work so they could leave. I'll bring Joseph and Amy over tomorrow to play with you, promise Alexander. I'll see you guys then.", I assure before giving the three of them another round of hugs. Saying goodbyes once more, I turn to leave once more. …...

(Currently)

After crying my eyes out for nearly two hours, to my amazement I find myself too exhausted to feel sorry for myself anymore tonight. Swiping the remaining tears from my eyes, I glance down at my watch and realize its a little after eleven o'clock. Crap, I should have been home an hour and a half ago. Startled when there's a buzzing in my pants pocket, I grab out my cell phone. Damn, I have six missed calls and they're all from Bessie and Bodie.

Oh, man. Those two must be worried sick right now. I'm so dead when I walk through the front door. My only hope is that they got tired of waiting and went to bed. That will spare me a lecture until oooh about breakfast time. Its not my fault though, I didn't know anyone was going to be at Pacey's place. Originally, I was going to drop off the letter I had written for Pacey and then return home before Bessie or Bodie realized I was ever gone.

Unfortunately, plans don't always go as expected. I was almost home free until Jack opened the damn front door. That's when my night as I know it went straight to hell. Neither Jack nor Dougie wasted anytime asking about what happened in New York. I had no choice but to explain things. Talking about my miscarriage hurt more than I was willing to show.

Soon as I left Pacey's, I drove to the docks and have been sitting in my truck a teary eyed wreck ever since. Turning the key in my trucks ignition, I hesitantly make my way back home. Shutting off my headlights, I pull into the drive as quietly as possible. Opening the driver door, I climb out and make my way up the front porch.

Breathing a sigh of relief when I walk inside and there's no one waiting for me, I make my way towards the kitchen. Blindly feeling around for a light switch, I jump back nearly a foot when a hand lands on my shoulder," Busted Missy, want to tell me where you disappeared to little sis before I wring your neck?"

" Bessie, hey. What are you still doing up?", I ask with as cheerful a smile as I can muster. Its not hard to see that Bess is upset with me. Couldn't she cut me some slack? I didn't intend to be gone so long.

" Sorry, Joe. I'm the one asking the questions here. Where were you? Why didn't you answer your phone? Do you know what time it is? You had us worried sick Joey! Why are your eyes all red and puffy?...Joey, have you been crying?", inquires Bessie with an immediate look of concern. So much for being angry with me, I guess. Sorry, Bess. You just asked one question too many. I'm not about to relive tonight and get myself all wound up and distraught again.

" Its not really something that I would care to talk about Bessie. I'm really...I'm just really exhausted right now. Couldn't you wait to lecture and yell at me until morning?", I question with a tired sigh before searching the fridge for something to eat. I haven't really ate since lunch, I kind of skipped out on dinner and now my stomach is growling. Smiling when I notice a slice of apple pie, I quickly snatch it from the fridge.

" Fine. Could you at least tell me where you were? Bodie and I were worried Joe.", reasons Bessie as she pours me a glass of milk and hands me a fork. I guess I could at least tell her where I was. Its not as though I have to mention the conversation that led up to my red puffy eyes.

" I'm sorry about that Bess, I really am. I didn't intend to stay out so late. I drove by Pacey's place to drop off a letter I had written for him. Its Friday, so I knew I wouldn't run into him and could avoid an awkward conversation. Unfortunately, I didn't count on Jack and Dougie being there with Amy and Joseph. The three of us got caught up talking, afterward I went for a drive to clear my head. I didn't realize how late it was until I looked at my watch. I didn't mean to worry you and Bodie, honest.", I confide with an exhausted sigh as I sneak a glance in Bessie's direction to gauge her reaction. Much to my relief, there is no longer agitation in her eyes. In fact...Bessie is smiling. What is up with her right now? She's kind of freaking me out.

" Actually, Joe. Its funny that you mentioned Pacey and that you stopped by his place. Especially considering that none other than mister Pacey J. Witter himself came by looking for you earlier as well.", reveals Bessie with a laugh at the irony of things. Wait, what? Did I hear her correctly? Pacey came by? That's impossible, its Friday night. The Ice House is packed on Fridays, he must have left early to come see me. What are the odds of that? I stop by Pacey's to drop off a letter for him and he finally comes by to see me?

" You have got to be kidding me, Bess. Pacey came by and I missed him?", I ponder out loud in frustration, isn't that just my luck? Here, I spend nearly two weeks wondering why I haven't seen or heard from Pacey and he stops over when I'm at his place? Someone up above has a twisted sense of humor.

" I'm afraid so, Joey. He waited for you as long as he could. He left a little over a half hour ago, Jack and Dougie were waiting for him. Pacey promised to watch Amy and Joseph so they could get away for the weekend.", informs Bessie before taking my now empty glass and plate from me. She has to be kidding me, I only missed Pacey by a mere half hour? What the hell! Fate must enjoy kicking me in the ass I guess.

" Great, who knows when I'll get to see him now.", I mutter with frustration as I run a tired hand through my hair. Ugh, whatever. I'm too tired to care right now. All I want to do is go to bed, I'm mentally and physically drained right now. Its a wonder I'm still standing.

" Don't be surprised if he stops by tomorrow, Joe. He promised Alexander that he would bring Amy and Joseph over to play. Bodie invited the three of them to dinner.", remarks Bessie with a growing smile. Pacey might stop by tomorrow? Oh my god, that's great! I'll finally have a chance to make amends with him over all that's happened between us. Ever since he took off from New York, I have felt terrible. I want things back to normal between Pacey and I.

" Really? That would be great, Bess. I really...I just want to apologize for everything that happened in New York and put that awful day and any other bitterness behind us.", I admit with a yawn before glancing at my watch once more. Oh, damn. Its nearly midnight. That would explain why I'm so tired, not to mention the day from hell I just experienced. All I want to do right now is put on my pajamas, crawl into bed and not wake up til at least ten o'clock if I'm lucky.

" Trust me Joey, I'm sure he wants nothing more than to do the exact same thing.", reassures Bessie before washing her hands in the sink. Startled when I notice her still smiling at me in an odd way, I only laugh to myself. I don't know whats wrong with Bess, but I'm too sleepy to ask. I'm just thankful she didn't tare me a new one for causing her and Bodie such distress over my whereabouts.

" Lets hope that your right Bessie. I don't know what I would do with myself if Pacey and I wound up at one another's throats once again. It would probably crush me. Thanks for not yelling at me like I expected you to. I think I'm just going to head upstairs to bed now. I'm dead tired.", I confess before making my way upstairs with Bessie not far behind me. After I brush my teeth and change, I'm headed straight to bed. I'm so tired I can hardly keep my eyes open anymore.

" I let you off easy Joe, you're lucky. Don't expect Bodie to do the same though in the morning. You're going to hear it from him, if I were you, I would start thinking of an apology now.", jokes Bessie over her shoulder with a laugh before disappearing into her room. Oh crap. I almost forgot about Bodie. Guess I'm not in the clear just yet. Oooh something tells me that I'm such a dead woman in the morning.

Walking into the bathroom, I waste no time in washing up and brushing my teeth. Making my way back to my bedroom once more, I rummage my closet for a clean pair of pajamas. Sighing when I find none, I notice an old shirt of Pacey's along with a pair of his sweat pants nestled in the back corner of my closet. Huh, that's weird. Here I thought I tossed all of Pacey's things he had left here after our breakup so long ago.

Hesitant at first, I finally decide to grab the clothes left behind by Pacey. I'm not really left with any other choice. All my damn night clothes are dirty. Pulling Pacey's old shirt over my head, I wriggle into his sweats. Examining myself in the mirror, I can't help but laugh at my appearance. Even after all these years his clothes are still big on me. Guess I haven't really grown that much since high school. Pacey sure has though, I would hate to see what his clothes now would look like on me. I would probably disappear into them! Not that I would mind necessarily, its nice having something on that once belonged to Pacey. Its almost as though I were in his arms right now.

Lifting the collar of Pacey's shirt toward my nose, I inhale deeply. Ugh, it even still smells like him. This truly is torturous, right now I would give anything to be able to climb into my bed and fall asleep in Pacey's arms. Instead, I'm here alone as usual. Not much I can do about that though. Hopefully tomorrow doesn't wind up turning into a battle zone between Pacey and I.

I want nothing more than for things to be right between the two of us once more. Even...even if it means that him and I are only really close friends and nothing else. Much as it would kill me not to have Pacey by my side, at least he wouldn't be out of my life completely. That is the last thing I would ever want. I love Pacey, and honestly I have just missed him so much lately.

The way I see it, theres not much that I can do right now. I'm not about to spend all night wracking my brain. I'll deal with tomorrow and Pacey when the time comes to. Right now, all that I want to do is go to sleep. Climbing into my bed, I pull the covers over me. Reaching to turn off my bedroom light, its then that I notice a piece of paper propped up on my bed stand.

Staring at the paper with confusion, I pick it up after a minute or so. Its a note and its in Alexander's hand writing. Huh, that's odd. Scanning my eyes over the paper, I quietly read Alexander's note to me," Dear aunt Jojo, I have been entrusted to deliver a very important letter to you. You'll never guess who its from...its from uncle Pacey! He stopped by while you were out. He was hoping to see you tonight, but could only wait so long before he had to leave. Uncle Pacey asked me if I could make sure you received this letter he wrote for you. Along with it he also, left a really pretty rose and a neat heart shaped box. I'm not supposed to say what's inside, its a surprise though. I hope that you and uncle Pacey are able to work out your differences, I love you both and want you to be happy. You haven't been for a while, but I have a feeling that you might be once you read Pacey's note and take a peek inside the little box he left for you. Good night aunt Jojo, I'll see you in the morning. Love you always, Alexander." …...


	16. Note in a box

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> True love

Description: this is a story I wrote while at work today. Its not really a story, its a letter to a guy that I'm in love with. I edited to fit Joey/Pacey. It's only a one shot for now unless I can think of somewhere to go with it. Suggestions are always loved if you like it and think it has potential to turn into more than just a one shot-er. This is my sixth Dawson's Creek story. I'll be writing this as well as Conflicted Love, Love Unrequited and Clueless Affection on here now.

Disclaimer: I may not own the characters but this story is original and from my imagination.

Author's note: this is my sixth try at a Dawson's creek story, be nice to me please. This could either be viewed in Pacey's or Joey's point of view. I'm writing it in Pacey's but it could also be viewed in Joey's if you use your imagination You decide and tell me who you see is as and why please. This is a Pacey/Joey fic, my version of how they got together. Enjoy and review thanks

Chapter #16

(Previously)

…...Climbing into my bed, I pull the covers over me. Reaching to turn on my bedroom light, its then that I notice a piece of paper propped up on my bed stand

Staring at the paper with confusion, I pick it up after a minute or so. Its a note and its in Alexander's hand writing. Huh, that's odd. Scanning my eyes of the paper, I quietly read Alexander's note to me," Dear aunt Jojo, I have been entrusted to deliver a very important letter to you. You'll never guess who its from...its from uncle Pacey! He stopped by while you were out. He was hoping to see you tonight, but could only wait so long before he had to leave. Uncle Pacey asked me if I could make sure you received this letter he wrote for you. Along with it he also, left a really pretty rose and a neat heart shaped box. I'm not supposed to say whats inside, its a surprise though. I hope that you and uncle Pacey are able to work out your differences, I love you both and want you to be happy. You haven't been for a while, but I have a feeling that you might be once you read Pacey's note and take a peek inside the little box he left for you. Good night aunt Jojo, I'll see you in the morning. Love you always, Alexander." …...

(Currently)

Staring at the white envelope with my named scrolled on the front under a single read rose, I hesitantly pick it up. Carefully opening the envelope, I take out the letter that's inside and begin reading it:

I don't know what to say, there's nothing to say. Not even sorry is enough for how much I have been a jerk as of recently Josephine Lynn Potter. There is no excuse for the way I reacted in New York, or even in the weeks after. When you told me that you were pregnant and engaged to that prick? I lost it. The last thing that I wanted to do was have another fight with you. What would have been the use? It wouldn't have changed anything.

Instead of giving you a chance to explain yourself, I left. I took off Joe. You never had a chance to say a word because I was gone before you ever opened your mouth. Joey, you have to believe me...if I had known that you...I never would have left. I would have stayed, I would have held you, I would have kissed your tears away...Joe, I would have figured out a way to make you feel better.

I'm sorry that I haven't called, stopped by or even written since I last saw you in New York. When I read your last letter, I felt like a jerk at the relief I felt when I had read you miscarried. It was selfish of me and if you never want to speak of me again because of this? I would completely understand. To be honest, I wasn't relieved that you miscarried...I was merely thankful that you weren't going to marry and make Greg the happiest man on earth. That prick doesn't deserve you Joey.

Hell, I don't even deserve you. I never did. I'm not sure why you chose me over Dawson all those years ago, but I'm tired of questioning it. If you chose me over him, obviously it was for a reason. Though I'm not exactly sure of the reason, who am I to argue? It was stupid of me to breakup with you all those years ago after prom Joe.

Truth be told, I'm an idiot. I always have been, I'm fairly certain that you've known this for a while. When I broke up with you, I was scared. I didn't know what else to do. At the time, I was sure it was bound to end between the two of us sooner or later. Way I saw it, better I severed the ties than you. If you would have dumped me after graduation like I expected you to, I never would have gotten over it.

Its not fair that I broke your heart and I'm sorry that I did Josephine. You didn't deserve that. You shouldn't have been hurt because of my damn insecurities. Seeing you last Christmas...that unexpected kiss we shared on behalf of a mistletoe toe that otherwise never would have happened...it brought back all those old memories.

We were getting along more than usual those last few months before Christmas last year. So much so that I had decided to propose to you on Christmas eve. I picked out the most beautiful engagement ring, you would have loved it Joey. I was all set to get down on one knee once we'd made it back to my place. I knew the timing was perfect. That is, until you got a call from none other than Dawson Leery.

He chose the exact moment I was about to pop the question to call from Los Angeles and wish you a Merry Christmas. When I heard you whisper you 'loved him too', I froze. It was then I realized, I didn't have a chance in hell with you. You were seeing Dawson, I was about to propose to you and you were seeing Dawson.

When I realized this, I was beyond crushed. I finally knew how you must have felt all those years ago after prom. Something inside me snapped. Before I knew what I was doing, I had picked an argument with you. All because I was hurt and jealous. After you left that night, I nearly broke my hand punching a hole in my living room wall.

For nearly a week straight, I wasn't able to use my left hand. Not long into last year, I had heard through the grapevine that Dawson and you had parted ways. At the time it didn't matter though, the damage was done. There was nothing I could do to take back what I had said to you on Christmas eve. I knew that you didn't want to see or hear from me.

It took all I could muster to mail out that first letter I had written to you this past Christmas. I figured it was time for me to break the ice finally. The last thing I ever expected was to hear back from you. I was sure you hated me after what happened the year before. When I heard back from you, I had become excited even a little hopeful. Then I found out about Greg.

I couldn't believe my damn luck, every time I think I have a chance to get you back, I find out your taken. Come to think of it, once I realized you were with that jerk, I began taking my frustrations out on you in written form. I'm a moron. I had no reason to do so Joe. All I wanted was to get you back, yet I was continually ruining my chances.

When you informed me things had ended between Greg and you, I knew if I hesitated for even a second another guy would swoop in and win you over. I wasn't about to miss my shot once more, that's when I came to New York and well...the rest you already know Potter. I know you're back in Capeside now, the reason I haven't written, called or stopped by until now is because I was afraid to.

Not a great excuse, I know. But its the truth. I'm not even all that sure if you want to see me. I know that I have been dying to see you, but what I want doesn't seem to matter. All that matters is what you want. If I came to see you and we wound up fighting again? I would feel like a complete asshole. Not that I'm already not one.

I do want to see you Josephine. Its just, I need a little time to gather up the courage. I'll come by to see you before the months up, I promise. Just...please be patient with me?

I love you Josephine Lynn Potter, I never stopped loving you. With hopes you never stopped feeling the same about me as well.

Sincerely yours,

Pacey J. Witter …...

Setting down the letter Pacey had written, I take a shaky breath as tears stream down my cheeks once more. Its funny, earlier I was convinced that I was all cried out. Guess I was wrong, I still have plenty of tears. Just my luck. Reading this letter only makes me miss Pacey even more. At least now I remember why we fought last Christmas, I forgot all about Dawson.

Truth is, I don't know why I ended back up with Dawson. He came to visit me in New York every so often and before I knew it, we wound up back together. At the time I figured, if I couldn't have Pacey why not be with the guy I was comfortable with. Not long after Pacey and I had our falling out that Christmas, Dawson and I parted ways. He said it was obvious that I wasn't over Pacey, coincidently that's exactly what Greg told me when we broke up.

I'm starting to see a pattern here. No relationship I'm in will ever work because I'm still hung up on Pacey J. Witter. Even after all these years, I find myself still wanting to be with him. Nothing has changed. I'm not over Pacey, I'm never going to be. All these years, even after he stomped my heart I still want to be with Pacey...I still love him.

Placing Pace's letter back on my bed stand, its then I notice the heart shaped box Alexander had mentioned in his note. Filled with curiosity, I pick up the box and begin to examine it. Wondering whats inside, I carefully open the box. What I see once I do so stuns me. Inside the heart shaped box is a silver diamond engagement ring with a pink heart shaped diamond.

Taking the diamond ring from its encasement, I examine it carefully. Its beautiful. I don't get it though, this has to be a joke right? Pacey's not honestly asking me to marry him...is he? Not knowing what to think, its then I notice a tiny folded up piece of paper wedged into the lid of the jewelry box. Taking it out, I hesitantly unfold and examine it.

Its from Pacey, neatly written in script the paper simply reads," Josephine, I love you. I have wanted to ask you to be my wife for a while now. There is no one else I would rather spend my life with. Unfortunately, every time I think about asking you somethings always in the way. Whether its Dawson, that jerk Greg, or up until now my own foolish pride and stupidity. I'm tired of letting obstacles get in my way. If you'll accept this engagement ring and let me, I intend to make you the happiest wife on earth someday. Please don't tell me its too late...I-I love you Joey. You don't have to answer right away, just know I want my future to be forever intertwined with yours." …...


	17. You're wearing my ring

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> True love

Description: this is a story I wrote while at work today. Its not really a story, its a letter to a guy that I'm in love with. I edited to fit Joey/Pacey. It's only a one shot for now unless I can think of somewhere to go with it. Suggestions are always loved if you like it and think it has potential to turn into more than just a one shot-er. This is my sixth Dawson's Creek story. I'll be writing this as well as Conflicted Love, Love Unrequited and Clueless Affection on here now.

Disclaimer: I may not own the characters but this story is original and from my imagination.

Author's note: this is my sixth try at a Dawson's creek story, be nice to me please. This could either be viewed in Pacey's or Joey's point of view. I'm writing it in Pacey's but it could also be viewed in Joey's if you use your imagination You decide and tell me who you see is as and why please. This is a Pacey/Joey fic, my version of how they got together. Enjoy and review thanks

Chapter #17

(Previously)

…...Placing Pace's letter back on my bed stand, its then I notice the heart shaped box Alexander had mentioned in his note. Filled with curiosity, I pick up the box and begin to examine it. Wondering whats inside, I carefully open the box. What I see once I do so stuns me. Inside the heart shaped box is a silver diamond engagement ring with a pink heart shaped diamond.

Taking the diamond ring from its encasement, I examine it carefully. Its beautiful. I don't get it though, this has to be a joke right? Pacey's not honestly asking me to marry him...is he? Not knowing what to think, its then I notice a tiny folded up piece of paper wedged into the lid of the jewelry box. Taking it out, I hesitantly unfold and examine it.

Its from Pacey, neatly written in script the paper simply reads," Josephine, I love you. I have wanted to ask you to be my wife for a while now. There is no one else I would rather spend my life with. Unfortunately, every time I think about asking you somethings always in the way. Whether its Dawson, that jerk Greg, or up until now my own foolish pride and stupidity. I'm tired of letting obstacles get in my way. If you'll accept this engagement ring and let me, I intend to make you the happiest wife on earth someday. Please don't tell me its too late...I-I love you Joey. You don't have to answer right away, just know I want my future to be forever intertwined with yours." …...

(Currently)

Having spent half the night crying, I finally fell asleep shortly after two in the morning. Waking up with Pacey's letter clutched to my chest, I stare at the ring on my left hand. Its beautiful. Its still hard to believe Pacey actually bought this for me. He mentioned how he had wanted to propose to me, I never imagined he would actually buy me a ring though.

I'm beyond confused right now. Do I want to marry Pacey? Am I going to say yes? In his note, he said that I don't have to answer him right away. I'm not an idiot though. I know Pacey is going to want an answer from me eventually. Do I see myself with anyone else? Absolutely not. Am I willing to commit the rest of my life to Pacey? Without a doubt. Am I ready to be married right now? ….Honestly, I don't know.

I want to be with Pacey. I love him. Whatever bitterness there is between us, I want resolved once and for all. These last five years apart have been rough without Pacey. Every guy I'm with has never made me anywhere near as happy as I was with him. It didn't matter who I was with after him, Charlie, Eddie, Christopher, Dawson….Greg; none of them mattered to me as much as he did.

Ironically enough, almost every time a relationship went bad and ended the reasoning was always the same. Eddie, Dawson, hell even Greg was convinced that I wasn't over Pacey. Truth is, they were all right. I'm not over him. The more I think, the more clear my answer becomes. I want Pacey in my life. I miss him. I want him in my life.

Placing the letter Pacey had written on my bed stand once more, the smell of bacon and eggs wafts its way upstairs. Mmm, breakfast. Glancing down at my watch, I realize its little after ten-thirty in the morning. Guess now is as good a time as ever to have my ass handed to me by Bodie. I left without telling him or Bessie where I was going last night.

Those two were worried sick about me and wondering where I was. I came home late and didn't bother answering their calls. The way I see it, Bodie deserves to lecture and yell at me for as long as he sees necessary. I'm not about to argue with him. Most I can do is apologize my ass off and hope that he understands and takes it easy on me once I tell him where I was.

Throwing the covers off of me, I climb out of bed. Combing out my messy hair, I pull it back into a loose ponytail. Not even bothering to change, I make my way downstairs. Expecting to see Bessie and Bodie in the dining room eating breakfast, I frown to myself when I find no one. What the hell? Where are they? Why do I smell breakfast yet there's no sight of anyone in the house whatsoever?

Walking from room to room, I let out a heavy sigh when I find no one to be found anywhere. Where could they have gone? Just about to walk back upstairs and search Bessie and Bodie's bedroom, I stop in mid step at the sound of his voice," Its about time that you woke up Potter."

Frozen in my tracks, I turn around to see none other than Pacey J. Witter himself standing in the kitchen doorway," Pacey, what are you..."

" Doing here?", finishes Pacey with a laugh and a smile before pouring two glasses of orange juice. Sitting down at the kitchen counter, he quietly waits for me to do the same. Not knowing what else to do, I eventually sit down beside Pacey.

" Well, yeah. Bessie said you were coming over this afternoon. Its not even eleven yet.", I point out before grabbing a plate and placing eggs, bacon and a few pancakes on it. Smearing butter and syrup onto my pancakes, I cut into them and take a satisfying bite.

" I was, but Joseph and Amy were wound up and couldn't wait any longer to see Alexander. Bessie and Bodie took Alexander and them to the park for a snowball fight and some sledding.", acknowledges Pacey before taking a drink of his orange juice. Poking at the last of my eggs, its not long before I notice him looking at me strangely.

" Umm, Pace? Why are you looking at me like that? Its kind of freaking me out.", I confide before pushing my now empty plate away from me. Standing up, I place my plate in the sink and rinse it off. Placing it in the dish rack, I lean against the kitchen sink with a sigh. Pacey is still looking at me funny and I have no idea why. Its really starting to weird me out.

" Sorry Joe, its just...well you're wearing the engagement ring. Does that mean...", starts Pacey hesitantly unable to finish his own question. Knowing exactly what he's asking, I lower my eyes to the ground. I'm unsure what to say. I know I want Pacey in my life. But am I ready to marry him?

" I don't no Pacey, I'm not saying no...its just, I don't know.", I explain with a shrug of my shoulders. Taking a risk, I glance up at Pacey. Much to my surprise, he's smiling at me. Its not long before I find myself smiling back at Pacey.

" I could live with I don't know, especially if that means you're not saying no.", admits Pacey before taking a hesitant step toward me. Unsure what else to do, I take a few nervous steps back. Having Pacey this close in proximity is slowly taking its toll on me. I'm finding it more and more difficult not to kiss him. Right now, I know that would be wrong.

" We have a lot to talk about Pacey. I really, I just want things to go back to normal between you and I. All this bitterness and resentment isn't healthy and I don't like it.", I confide with a frown all the while. Pacey and I used to be so close. There was a time when we were dating that we were almost inseparable. These days it seems we can't stop fighting one another.

" I know we do Joe, I know. I want to fix things between us...I miss you. All I want is to be with you. I never should have let you go.", confesses Pacey before taking another step toward me. Its not long before he has me back against the counter with his arms are either side of me. I'm trapped. I don't like being trapped. Not cool Pace, not cool.

" I know that you do Pace, its just...we're a long way from solving any of our problems.", I remind with a tired sigh. Tensing when Pacey brushes a loose strand of hair from my face, I stare up at him with uncertainty in my eyes. Startled when he wraps me in his arms, its not long before I find myself leaning into Pacey's embrace. Much as I want to fight things, I find myself unable to. Standing here like this with Pacey's arms around me? Nothing else has ever felt so right.

" I know we are Joe, its just...I love you.", confesses Pacey before locking his lips onto mine. Unsure what else to do, I kiss him back. Grabbing holding of Pacey's shirt, I pull him close to me. With a shy smirk I nip at his bottom lip. I'm not sure what this means, but I honestly don't care. All I want to do is continue kissing Pacey. Laughing when he props me up on the counter, I place kisses all over his forehead and cheeks before he captures my lips again in another knee buckling lip lock.

Not paying attention to anything around us, its not long before Pacey and I hear foot steps walking in the front door. Running excitedly into the kitchen, its not long before the two of us hear an ecstatic Alexander happily exclaim," Uncle Pacey, does this mean that Aunt Jojo finally said yes? I still get to be your best man right? You promised, my mom and dad heard you. Stop kissing and answer me!"...


	18. Not going anywhere

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> True love

Description: this is a story I wrote while at work today. Its not really a story, its a letter to a guy that I'm in love with. I edited to fit Joey/Pacey. It's only a one shot for now unless I can think of somewhere to go with it. Suggestions are always loved if you like it and think it has potential to turn into more than just a one shot-er. This is my sixth Dawson's Creek story. I'll be writing this as well as Conflicted Love, Love Unrequited and Clueless Affection on here now.

Disclaimer: I may not own the characters but this story is original and from my imagination.

Author's note: this is my sixth try at a Dawson's creek story, be nice to me please. This could either be viewed in Pacey's or Joey's point of view. I'm writing it in Pacey's but it could also be viewed in Joey's if you use your imagination You decide and tell me who you see is as and why please. This is a Pacey/Joey fic, my version of how they got together. Enjoy and review thanks

Chapter #18

(Previously)

…..." We have a lot to talk about Pacey. I really, I just want things to go back to normal between you and I. All this bitterness and resentment isn't healthy and I don't like it.", I confide with a frown all the while. Pacey and I used to be so close. There was a time when we were dating that we were almost inseparable These days it seems we can't stop fighting one another.

" I know we do Joe, I know. I want to fix things between us...I miss you. All I want is to be with you. I never should have let you go.", confesses Pacey before taking another step toward me. Its not long before he has me back against the counter with his arms are either side of me. I'm trapped. I don't like being trapped. Not cool Pace, not cool.

" I know that you don't Pace, its just...we're a long way from solving any of our problems.", I remind with a tired sigh. Tensing when Pacey brushes a loose strand of hair from my face, I stare up at him with uncertainty in my eyes. Startled when he wraps me him in his arms, its not long before I find myself leaning into Pacey's embrace. Much as I want to fight things, I find myself unable to. Standing here like this with Pacey's arms around me? Nothing else has ever felt so right.

" I know we are Joe, its just...I love you.", confesses Pacey before locking his lips onto mine. Unsure what else to do, I kiss him back. Grabbing holding of Pacey's shirt, I pull him close to me. With a shy smirk I nip at his bottom lip. I'm not sure what this means, but I honestly don't care. All I want to do is continue kissing Pacey. Laughing when he props me up on the counter, I place kisses all over his forehead and cheeks before he captures my lips again in another knee buckling lip lock

Not paying attention to anything around us, its not long before Pacey and I hear foot steps walking in the front door. Running excitedly into the kitchen, its not long before the two of us hear an ecstatic Alexander happily exclaim," Uncle Pacey, does this mean that Aunt Jojo finally said yes? I still get to be your best man right? You promised, my mom and dad heard you. Stop kissing and answer me!"...

(Currently; Pacey's pov)

" Ummm, Joe. I believe that your nephew Alexander asked you a question?", calls Bodie from behind the two of us. What a good question is was too. Good for you Alexander for helping out your uncle Pacey. Way to put Joey on the spot. I know I said she could take her time with an answer, but I'm dying over here.

" I heard him Bodie, way to put your aunt Jojo on the spot Alexander.", mutters Joey with a sigh and a frown. Why is she so hesitant with her answer? Joey's wearing my ring. If she didn't want to marry me, she wouldn't have that on her finger right now.

" Don't mention it, I'm tired of the two of you fighting like a bunch of five year olds. Kiss and make up already.", complains Alexander with a roll of his eyes. Wow, its not often that you get put in your place by a seven year old. He's sure smarter than the two of us put together that much is for certain.

" Soooo, are the two of you back together? I don't mean to pry but I can't help but notice you're wearing Pacey's engagement ring Joey.", points out Bessie with an arched eyebrow. Oh, if only it were that simple. Joey and I might have just kissed and made up, literally, but we're far from having worked things out.

" Its not exactly that simple Bess. I know that I want to be with Pacey, but for that to happen the two of us are going to have to take things one step at a time. We have a lot of problems to work on before I walk down the aisle with him...but I know that I definitely want to someday.", explains Joey before glancing over at me with a shy smile. So she does want to marry me, just not until we work out our differences. I could live with that. At least I know that I've got Potter back in my life once more.

" If that's what it will take Joe, I'm more than willing.", I assure before I take her hand in mine. This causes Joey to kiss my cheek sweetly. Startled when I feel someone hugging my leg, I look down and see its none other than Amy. Leaning down, I pick her up in my arms.

" Well its nice to see the two of you are trying to work things out.", offers Bodie with a smirk as he pats me on my back. I knew Bodie would be supportive. When Joey and I ended things back in high school, Bodie was disappointed in me to say the least. When I explained to him why I had chose to break things off with Joey, I guess he understood why I did what I did in some kind of odd way.

" Does that mean you'll be forgiving of the fact that I had Bess and you worried sick about me last night?", asks Joey with a hopeful smile. Turning his attention toward Joey, Bodie folds his arms across his chest. Uh oh, somehow I don't see her getting off that easily.

" Do you really think that I'm going to let you off the hook that easily? Jo, you left without telling us. We had no idea where you were. You weren't answering your damn cellphone. You had us sick with concern young lady. The next time you go out, you tell us where you're going. Do you understand?", lectures Bodie in a loud voice that causes Joey to lower her head in shame. Wow, I almost feel bad for her. But Joey knows how much Bess and Bodie worry about her, especially as of recently. Did she really expect to get off scotch free?

" Yes, Bodie. I'm sorry. I didn't expect to be so long. I went to Pacey's to drop off a letter I had written. I figured I would be safe since it was Friday and he'd be at the Ice House. But Jack and Dougie wound up being there with these two rug rats. The three of us started talking and I lost track of time, then I went for a drive. I promise to call next time.", confides Joey in a sincere tone. Whoa, wait. Joey went to my place because she'd known I wouldn't be there? What the hell is that supposed to mean? Joey didn't want to see me?

" Joe, are you saying you went to my house last night because you knew I wouldn't be home?...Why?", I question with confusion before dropping her hand from mine. Lowering her head once more in guilt, Joey simply shrugs her shoulders. No, I'm going to need more of an answer than that this time Joey.

" Its not for the reason's your probably thinking Pacey, I promise. Its just...I hadn't seen you since New York. I didn't want to take the chance of you and I getting into an argument. Besides, I wanted you to come to me and make the first move.", admits Joey as she sneaks a peek up at me. Well...damn. I can't really be mad at her for that. I took off on Joey in New York, she had every right to expect that I would come at her swinging had she made the first move.

" …...I guess that I could understand that Joe.", I acknowledge with an exhausted sigh. To be honest, the last thing I want to do is fight right now. In an effort to show Joey that I'm not upset with her, I wrap her in my arms once again. This seems to comfort Joey as she places her hand over mine once more.

" Uncle Pacey, are you and Jojo done fighting? Amy and I don't like seeing the two of you angry with one another.", pipes in Joseph with a happy smirk as he breaks the now awkward silence. That's a good question. I would like to think that we are. The last thing I want is to argue with Joey. We have a lot to work on, but hopefully our disagreements are finally in the past.

" Yeah Joseph, I think your uncle Pacey and I are done fighting. I'm tired of being angry with your uncle, I love him too much.", confides Joey in a sweet voice. Unable to control the grin spreading its way across my face, I kiss at Joey's cheek sweetly. It feels really good to hear her say that once more, I never thought that I would.

" Well, this is cause for a celebration. Pace, Bodie. Why don't the two of you relax while Joey and I make sandwiches for everyone.", offers Bessie before making her way towards the fridge and grabbing out some deli meats. That's right, its lunch time now. Joey only just ate breakfast though. She's not going to want to eat again. That doesn't mean her and I couldn't make lunch for everyone else.

" Actually, Bess. Why don't you let Joey and I fix everyone lunch, afterward we could all sit and enjoy the chocolate custard pie that I baked this morning.", I suggest as I take out a few plates and playfully shoo both her and Bodie from the kitchen. Searching around for the bread, Joey and I get to work fixing up ham, turkey and cheese sandwiches.

" You know, I'm really glad that you're here right now Pacey. I have been dealing with a lot lately and honestly...I just really need you in my life right now.", confesses Joey after a few minutes of silence. Without saying another word, I pull Joey in for a hug. Its not hard to guess what she's talking about. Joey just went through a miscarriage, I can't imagine how difficult that must be for her.

" I'm not going anywhere Potter, I promise. I know that you and I need to talk out our differences. But if you want to talk about...well, what happened back in New York...I'm alright with that and am more than willing to listen to you.", I reassure Joey with a gentle kiss to her forehead. Studying Joey's face, I sigh when I notice a single tear roll down her cheek. Using my thumb to wipe it away, I give Joey a light kiss. This in turn earns a smile from her. Joey's been through a lot. Things that she shouldn't of had to have gone through alone. Bessie and Bodie have been here for her the best that they could. Now its my turn though. If listening to her explain what it was that exactly happened between her and Greg to lead to their break up and her eventual pregnancy and miscarriage...as much as it might kill me, I'll listen to Joey as long as takes. I want to be with her, and if that means dealing with her past than I guess that's what I'll have to do. …...


End file.
